! ... Gerardus'  25,000  Posts ... !

~ My Pages and my Posts are my Legacy ~
( Do not laugh so loud - I am already doing That )

... My point here Is ...
How could I possibly have a Legacy
when I as an illusionary person know that I do not actually Exist?

For more on This
... Gerardus Speaks ...

06 - 1999

                   Here follow some the posts I wrote to TriLite.
                            ... Have fun and Enjoy ...

         ! WOW - All I can say is that I sure wrote a lot of posts - WOW !

                                   = = = = = = =


On Jan 01 1999 I send the following to the TriLite List.
No one volunteered to supply the $500,000,000 USA Funds.
Too bad - it would have been fun! - Gerardus


Let's say: 
About $500,000,000 (in American Funds) would help to build a TriLiteCenter! 
People would come there to learn about Life. Classes or workshops for free 
and anyone who is ready to instruct or teach will be sleeping and/or living 
upstairs (Cost Free). Motel suites for the participants who are taking 
courses are available at no cost as well. One must take courses and show 
progress however! Brand new Library/Bookstore where any New Age Book we 
might think of can be had for free (Limit 11 books). Food will be supplied 
24 hours a day. All Staff is allowed to live in! Modern Motels up to three 
rooms, depending on the accommodation required for the Children (no kids) 
who come along with the instructors and/or staff, will be available for 

Baby sitting is free as well, but no longer than eight hours per 
day, five times a week. 24 hours Cafeteria supplies free food for all. 
Staff will work no longer than six hours per day, but shift work will be 
required for some (Two out of three weekends off). All staff and personnel 
must be at least 33 years old and dress neat. The TriLiteCenter will look 
like a cross between a "Flying J Fuel Center" and a "Shopping Mall" without 
most shops. First location will be in the outskirts of Mesa, AZ. to be 
duplicated elsewhere when the next 500 Mill becomes available. Maximum 
stay two years only, unless too important to be missed. (Trustworthy full 
time Book Keeper required to pay the bills) Donations are welcome but no 
receipts will be issued...

- - - - - - - - - - -

I envision a world in which every human being has awakened to the knowledge 
that we are the 'Creative Force' in Human Form. When this awareness becomes 
realized within all of us, Love is the result! Everyone will know then that 
all of us are One Family, One Being and have One Purpose. Which is to share 
our abundance freely and love the Self We Are in Human Form...

Light... Love... and Laughter. 
~ Gerardus ~


Date: Tue, 12 Jan 1999 12:08:01 -0700
To: TriLite@UserHome.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Re: TriLite: Fwd: Hello from Joeseph P. Firmage
Sender: owner-trilite@UserHome.com
Reply-To: TriLite@UserHome.com

This message was sent by: Gerardus 
Dan Klatt, write: 
I'm curious what your relationship is to Joe Firmage or his program. I 
the URL:

John here: 
I never heard about Joeseph P. Firmage until I read the conversations here 
on TriLite discussing his theories and wealth (which at least one TriLiter 
presumes to have been plundered from those less fortunate). Last Sunday 
our local blurb, the Orange County Register, had an article - of about 30 
col. in., by Andrew Quinn of Reuters about J.P. Very interesting, very 
brilliant guy! "A physics major at the University of Utah, Firmage was 18
when he formed his first company, Serius, 

Gerardus here: 
Me thinks that Joe Firmage certainly is not just another bloke to be 
dismissed. Have not read much of his book yet, but he is certainly not 
alone in speaking about contacts and UFOs. There are hundreds of people 
like him but only a few might have to story straight. Many of you might 
have read the stories from Alex Collier and Val Valerian. Not your average 
young Souls either - that's for sure!

The truth just might be indeed that we are so mind-polluted with inspired 
thoughts (or no thoughts whatsoever) from the people that rule us that we 
might be incapable of making sincere decisions. In order to help the Earth 
and Mankind we just have to be helped by off planet forces. Many of them 
have been instrumental to make us the way we are in the first place. Very 
few true thinkers left. And yes, we are only running on two cylinders out 
of twelve! Sounds true to me... 

Come to think of it - has anyone on TriLite ever thought about the Birth of 
Jesus and that funny Star that everybody saw then, and now still speaks of 
and has on their Christmas tree? Was that a UFO - telling us something? 
And what about all these Crop-Circles? 

When I see a baby drown - I am ready to help... 

Is Mankind that Baby? - Gerardus.


Date: Thu, 14 Jan 1999 20:15:59 -0700
To: TriLite@UserHome.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Re: TriLite: Helga's posts

This message was sent by: Gerardus 
Helga here:
Until... one day I heard a whisper. Someone said, 'the earth was a divine 
play ground' another voice called it 'the play ground of the gods'. I got 
kind of worried. Was I a god who played or was I a toy god played with. 
I started to (ob)serve, 
the game of Chess, 
a dual colored board 
varied players 
classes of players 
some players jumped 
others couldn't move 
some were priviledged from the start 
others had to start from scratch 
some were permitted different moves 
some of my moves enabled others to move 
some of their moves enabled me 
sometimes I showed them a move 
just so I could make my move and take them out 
and I still wonder who are the pawns? 
And I want to play both sides. Tired of being the black horse, want to be 
the white horse - sometimes. And now I am not playing that much anymore. 
I remember, slowly, move by move, that every move I make affects another and 
every move the other makes affects me. I think we are ready for a new 
GameBoard - one where we don't want to take eachother out, but take 
each other along. Come Friends, let's play!

Hi Helga - Gerardus here: 
Nice game you play Helga - it certainly is "catchy" for there are many 
players here today! And indeed, the illusion we are subjected to, seems to 
suggest that we take each other out and not take each other along. I do not 
think so. And also, the new GameBoard is already in use...

The rules of the game are of such a nature that it is difficult to oversee 
more than one player or game at the time. In actuality, I do feel that all 
of us take each other along at all times! For the multi-level-mosaic of 
the game is played on different levels and any move on any level influences 
all other moves on all other levels. In the mean time, the universal 
secret is hidden from all players while they play. This universal secret 
is, that there is only one player - Humanity. For all along, each player 
really is all other players in different form. Only the Observers know 

Game over means that all players end up in the same Box again.
This Box is Home - Gerardus 


Date: Sat, 16 Jan 1999 11:51:29 -0700
To: TriLite@UserHome.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: TriLite: What Re-incarnates? --- You!
Sender: owner-trilite@UserHome.com
Reply-To: TriLite@UserHome.com

This message was sent by: Gerardus 
Gerardus here: 

I have been speaking of reincarnation on my pages and some of the inquiries 
I get from my pages go like this:

Questioner: (Questioner is on TriLite at the moment) 

In reply to my last question: "What is it that reincarnates?", your answer 
was: "It is your soul". I asked several people if they would explain what 
they meant when they talked about their soul and I got a lot of different 
answers. Nobody exactly knew what the word soul meant. Could you explain to 
me what the exact meaning is.

Gerardus here: 
NO! I cannot explain and I think nobody on earth can. 
The point is ---- What IS What?? What IS Any Thing?
We could ask ourselves: What is steel? What is rock? What is gold? What 
is grass? What is flesh? What is cookie dough? I don't know what it is 
and nobody knows either. 

Here is why! 
All things are atoms and molecules. Are they? What are those?? 
Atoms and molecules are NAMES people have given to the tiny rascals that 
make up matter. (They think it makes up matter) Atoms move like crazy and 
nobody has ever seen one but the human imagination says - look this is what 
it looks like or is! It's mostly empty - Hmmm?! All in all, we could 
call all material things - energy of some kind. An Energy or a Force 
Field! No doubt our Soul is also some kind of energy. Energy of a 
different kind. The kind we do not see. Funny thing though - glass we do 
not see either and it is not even invisible. Or is it?

So what is the Soul? All I can say is - It's YOU! And what is that? 
Only YOU can know that!! From a human point of view - well at least mine 
point of view - the entire universe is a mystery. Period!
For now let's say, that Soul is a form of Spirit which is a form of Energy 
which is a form of Light which is an aspect of The Infinite Light or TIL or 
God! Who or what is God? --- YOU! 


Does soul include memory? 

Gerardus here: 
Yes and no! Soul IS The Memory - Soul is what we ARE! We are Spiritual 
Beings (Souls) living in human bodies. Once we are in Spirit (out of matter 
bodies) memory might not be necessary for we are out of time and space. 
Meaning everything is right Here and Now. Memory would be redundant. When 
we live in a matter body memory seems to work through our brains (What ARE 
brains?) and we can recall certain happenings. Even happenings from 
different lifetimes. Why not? - for all of it is right Here and Now! 

The trouble is, the Body-Brain does not think that way and it blocks itself 
from being able to recall previous lifetimes easily. It is set up that way 
on purpose. One need to go in trance to recall other lifetimes. What is 
Trance? Different state of Mind. What is Mind? Mind is Consciousness. 
What is Consciousness?? It's US! It's YOU! And what is US and what is 
YOU? Don't know that either but we are living in order to find out what 
we really are. I guess it comes down to what the definition of is - is. 
(Bill Clinton might have a point here).

I think/feel that what we are is The Truth - Life - the Universe - TIL. 
What that is, is what we are doing with it! Which is - living life as a 
human being at this moment. Next time we might want to be an elephant or a 
white mouse. Why not? 

Hope this helps - Gerardus


Date: Thu, 18 Feb 1999 11:35:33 -0700
To: TriLite@UserHome.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Re: TriLite: Angels don't play this Haarp

This message was sent by: Gerardus 
Hi Everyone, 
Not to long ago, I mentioned the title of a book (see subject line). 
Gerardus asked: What could we do..... see yesterday's postings.. 
Helga here: 
I don't know the answer. But for me it is - What can I read to stay 
I have also been paying attention to Richard Hoagland's pages. The apparent 
weather testing/manipulations should be of concern to many. 
Here is an excerpt from an interview with the author of "Angels don't play 
this Haarp"

Gerardus here: 
Datre says that the weather is controled by people who are on the moon. 
They direct storms to countries that are least favored to the Rulers of the 

I don't know anything else that could be done but mail the elected 
officials in Washington DC. 
Here is one way of doing this: 
Announcing "Hear Me Now," a new email facility that gets your message to 
all of Congress at once! Here is a way to get your views known on Capitol 

Just go to http://www.hearmenow.com and let your views be heard!
When the people lead, the leaders follow! 
Otherwise, someone with possibly malevolent aims is sure to fill the void... 


Date: Wed, 03 Mar 1999 19:32:25 -0700
To: TriLite@UserHome.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Re: TriLite: Ooops..sorry

This message was sent by: Gerardus 

Doreen here: 
Richard Bach's book "ILLUSIONS" not Reflections...you probably all 
spotted that not so deliberate mistake. There is a phrase on the cover 
that says...Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is 
If your'e alive....it isn't.... 
>Can't say that I have felt that I have a MISSION, and I have no time for 
>missionaries...wonder why I dislike that word....rambling now at 
>1-45a.m.U.K......night to all...doreen

Hi Doreen... 
By tomorrow morning you might have discovered that your mission is a 
self-chosen journey upon which you appoint yourself as the Center of the 
Universe. This gives you room to spread your wings along with your hidden 
talents to enable you to find an opening that likes you. One does things 
by not-doing. Or by the Law of Reversed Efforts. It really means, drink 
when thirsty and eat when hungry. Just don't be too picky in what the 
opening provides. 

Most people like to help others. It's a deep deep hidden 
nature within them that they need to discover yet. Helping them to 
discover this puts you on a freeway to Sainthood. Just make sure you have 
no back seat drivers yell louder than your inner voice. Life is a cinch, 
but only when you live it by the Law of Reversed Efforts. The trick is to 
utilize these Laws without trying to take advantage of them...

My Soul is Brilliant - Gerardus


Date: Sat, 06 Mar 1999 19:33:34 -0700
To: studycircle@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Reply-to: studycircle@onelist.com
Subject: [studycircle] Re: new to the list

From: Gerardus 
At 06:53 PM 99/03/06 -0600, you wrote: 
From: "Heather"  
I was baptised in January of 1997, I have no returning to do, learning, 
growing and sharing yes, but I am quite firm in my faith. 
I practiced the I am my own God thing while involved in Satanism, and it was 
not fulfilling. Faith in Jesus has been very fulfilling. 
I will, however, view your web site, I am always interested in seeing what 
others believe in. Don't worry, I will not be attacking anyone's beliefs. 

Hi Heather... 
I do not believe in anything - I know what I know. Very little no doubt, 
but it beats believing a lot. I was baptized on Dec. 25 1927 or there 
abouts. Fine! So what? Being baptized or confirmed or receive any other 
sacrament does not make us one bit wiser or more knowledgeable in 
anywhichway whatsoever with respect to life. Our Life! Your Life! If 
anything it diverts the issue to be investigated. Life is an investigation 
into why we are here, who we are, and why is the world what it is. A bit 
Why are there no instructions pinned on our navel when we enter this Plane 
of Illusion? Tell you why - all the instructions are present within. Within 
the Heart - within the Soul - within the Self we Are. We need to learn to 
listen to our Self. We are the very Self living in our own creation.

Religions however will never tell you this, because likely they do not 
know, and if they knew and tell people they would lose them all. Religions 
do not like that. They would lose their power over the masses or 
followers. Wanna be a follower? Your Choice!

Religions are for people who are in certain stages of evolvement and 
therefore need instructions on how to behave and what to believe in. 
Religions are useful to them. There comes a time however, in which each and 
every one of us must become responsible for our own development. This means 
listening to the Voice within. We all are Holographic Duplicates of the 
Creator. The Universe is a Holographic Phenomenon and all of are Images of 
the Whole. IOW: the story is written within...

Do what YOU feel best for you. I cannot live your life and I would not 
want you or any religion to live my Life or tell me what to do, what to 
believe and whether or not I sinned last night and why. If you are ready 
for my pages you will not be able to stay away from it. Be my Guest! 
Religions, I have outgrown the lot of them... 

What religion did Jesus have? 
Was he a Catholic or a Baptist, a disguised Mormon maybe? 
Jesus had a direct connection to the Self of Creation. 
He spoke of the Father and said: I and the Father are One! 
Did he save the World? Did he save Mankind? From what? For what? 
I am only asking question here - if anyone considers this to be an attach - 
So be it!

EVERY Human Being on earth is equal to the Father!! 
The Father IS every Soul and body in Creation. 
The Father or the Creator IS Creation. 
Most religions keep people from finding this out.

Now - I write all these because I know there people on this list who need 
it. You might not need it Heather so just take what you can handle and 
delete the rest.

Light... Love... and Laughter. 
~ Gerardus ~


Date: Thu, 22 Apr 1999 21:01:20 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: [TriLite] Being Man - Being Human...

From: Gerardus 

Gay here: 
The world has not gone insane. It has always been as it is now - violent 
from the primordial through to the present. All that is illusionary are 
the borders drawn that are subject to change. 

Gerardus here: 

As soon as Man loses the conscious connection with his Spiritual Self, the 
physical manifestation (Man) begins to behaves in an insane manner. It 
begins to functions from the ego, from the Sexual, from Fear, from Greed 
and from Power! Not always has it been that way. Many great civilizations 
were on this earth before and they functioned from their real Self. IOW: 
they knew who they were! This will be so again soon...

At this particular time period however, (say 8000 years) we purposely 
agreed to lose ourselves in our physical creation in order to experience 
the result of this action. Only when this is experienced can we gain the 
wisdom what Physical Man really is all about. At this time, Man's 
Spiritual self is not consciously present in Mankind in general. It truly 
means, that Physical Man is going it alone, and goes through Hell in order 
to learn that the physical being in and by itself is but a sophisticated 
machine with brains and functions from greed, fear and other negative 
emotions as well as thoughts. This is what we see clearly all around us!

To function from the Physical only is a valid part of an evolutionary 
process or experience. Not necessarily though, is this a Human 
Evolutionary process. There is a difference between Man and Human. A Human 
Being has some measure of Soul or Spiritual Self present. Being only Man, 
is being only a trained machine or robot, that can be programmed, 
conditioned to do anything! This includes killing his fellow Man. 

We are each other's Brothers and Sisters! To not see this is a lack of 
spiritual understanding, this understanding all Human/Soul Beings have in 
some measure. Being a religious being however, like so many billions on 
earth are, is no guarantee that Soul is present! Within religious beings 
habit and conditioning is present. Soul is present when the Inner begins 
to control the Outer. When the God Within awakens! Within religious beings 
this God is asleep...

I envision a world in which every human being has awakened to the knowledge 
that we are the 'Creative Force' in Human Form. When this awareness becomes 
realized within all of us, Love is the result! Everyone will know then that 
all of us are One Family, One Being and have One Purpose. Which is to share 
our abundance freely and love the Self We Are in Human Form...

Light... Love... and Laughter. 
~ Gerardus ~


Date: Mon, 26 Apr 1999 09:03:02 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: [TriLite] Re: The sweatshirt guru

Gerardus here: 
Just between you and me: 
I've given up the search for Truth. 
I am now looking for a good Laugh!

Mahrouk here: 
YES G-man That's IT. I think this is why we all love Ken soooo much.

Gerardus here: 
Yes, he is known and adored as the New Age Savior. 
He is the very Originator of the Religion of Laughs! 
Everyone on TriLite is his follower. Some are baptized. 
Everyone becomes a Laughing Saint after 10001 Laughs. 
His motto is: Make it a belly one - stitches are free...

Laughs are my Servants 
Money my very Malarkey 
Kindness is my future Goal 
Deliverance from Sadness my Destiny!

All this because of Ken KLR 

(Ken's Laughter Roars)
I am in Heaven - Gerardus


Date: Mon, 26 Apr 1999 13:17:55 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Reply-to: TriLite@onelist.com
Subject: [TriLite] Re: Columbine/separate

At 01:50 PM 1999/04/26 EDT, you wrote: 
From: KLR1@aol.com 
In a message dated 4/26/99 4:11:17 PM !!!First Boot!!!, frv@vsnl.com writes: 
I have an observation (my opinion). These boys were also beings of light. 
 yes BJ it occurred to me to wonder whether these boys AND the children 
 they killed were ALL advanced Souls who jointly decided to play out this 
 drama to act as a sort of Wake up call? 
 but if this were so would it mean all violence (at this time) can be 
 explained in the same way. Perhaps not? hmmmm just exploring 
Just wondering, but if we choose our lives before we begin them. If we 
choose our parents and every detail that can best bring about a lesson we 
want to learn, I wouldn't think it would always be a pleasant lesson that 
others around us might appreciate. They may even hate the lesson we choose 
to learn.

If someone were to spend his childhood absolutely hating others 
who commit terrible injustices, wouldn't he want to replace that hatred the 
next time around? Wouldn't he choose to be the very thing he despised in 
order to simply understand? I don't know....perhaps I'm simply trying to 
rationalize irrational behavior. 
hmm Ken

Gerardus here: 
I feel that not everything is precisely "cut and dried" for us to act out 
in the physical. I agree however, that there is a general plan with open 
choices and opportunities. How we use these choices and opportunities adds 
to our Soul Value as I call it. 

Physical Life is for learning to make proper choices. If we don't - we miss 
the mark! It might mean that the next time we will be subjected to an 
early death or a major change in our life. How we react to this is the 
lesson. We learn the most when we lose! 

I feel that there is a universal trade-off to which we have agreed. An Eye 
for an Eye and a Tooth for a Tooth, but not all Eyes and Teeth are the 
same. All this means that the World and the Universe is full of surprises 
within the Plan of Creation. This also makes it interesting for the 
Overseeing Spiritual Forces we know as our Masters or Benefactors. After 
all they need surprises as well...

So when we are born, we might know that we are going to be a Carpenter, a 
Lawyer, a Nurse, a Doctor or a Bookkeeper, but we do not necessarily know 
what kind of body-mind we will have to work with or what kind of 'jobs' we 
will have. As I see it, the body mind plays a very important part in our 
daily life and in our accomplishments as a Soul... 

Another thing is, that most people are totally unconscious on the other 
side and end up in any kind of a body with any kind of a body-mind. IOW: 
they just land and have no 'history of knowing' to govern themselves. Here 
is where the surprises might be the greatest while all yet is free will or 
free choice. I feel that only a few of us work from our Soul's Wisdom for 
we have learned to listen. The majority of the people on the planet at 
this time is here only for the ride and gains experience by their deeds, be 
they mistakes or good works... 

Wisdom is the Result of Experience - Gerardus


Date: Tue, 27 Apr 1999 16:48:17 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 

Evin here:
(In the last part of the Conclusion of Personal and Impersonal Gods)
Awareness opens doors. When these doors open, new probabilities present 
themselves, and we can move forward. Perhaps we can move forward together, 
tolerant of our differences. We could honor each other as human beings who 
are sharing the gift of life. If we did this, it would not matter if we 
believed in a personal God, an impersonal God, or no God at all. Actions 
speak louder than beliefs and can change the world. If humanity acts on 
this idea, we would bring more peace to the world.

Gerardus here:
Thank you Evin for your post! No mean feat your writing...

Lately all words to me, seem to fade and merge into the "knowing 
conclusion" that there is no God of any description, neither Personal nor 
Impersonal. Naturally this is only my conclusion or reality... 

I declare that all we see around us, high and low, visible and invisible, 
is a form of Life of which we are participating creators since ever. IOW: 
we live in our own Reality! Collectively and Personally. If this reality 
needs a God of any kind - it will be so. If this reality is created from 
within - that's where this Creator/God resides... 

What else is there to say? Not much, except that what we see and 
experience around us is our own creation - our mind and heart expressed - 
our thoughts and intentions make it so! To look from within and above to 
things without and below, makes Life easier to grasp...

Kindness and Laughter is the Clue - Gerardus


Date: Thu, 29 Apr 1999 18:46:11 -0600
To: gerardus@telusplanet.net
From: Gerardus 
Subject: What is God - TIL ?

BJ here: 
Gerardus, in your opinion, what is god? What creates God. Not who. 
Are we the form? 

Gerardus here: 
First of all the word God is outdated and should not be used anymore. Let's 
use, The Infinite Light - TIL. TIL is Energy. This energy has the 
capabilities to split itself into all kinds of different Energy Fields that 
in some way become an Entity or Being seemingly all by itself. It seems to 
separate itself from the Main Cloud or Field. (It really does not!) Some of 
these Energies are a Rabbit, a Fly or a Human Being. There are am unlimited 
amount of these Energy-Forms...

IOW: This Energy or TIL is or became Everything That Exist! Any place as 
well as no place. Some of this Energy or TIL has specified itself and 
became the Physical Creation all around and above us. This physical 
material is of a certain frequency range and since we are born into this 
theater we think that this is all there is. This is so because most of us 
do not recognize any other frequencies/realities that have their being 
beyond the Physical Range of Vibration...

So what is TIL? All energy vibration with any frequency or pattern IS what 
makes up TIL. It's all around us, BUT we only see the physical range since 
we are attuned to that range. We as Spiritual Beings (Souls) live in this 
body and this body fools us into thinking that there is nothing beyond the 
physical. The physical is a reflection of the non-physical however, for it 
comes about by means of thought. Thought then is the Creator and this 
Creator in its travels through its universe lives in its own creations as 
if it is some kind of separated and isolate Being. Being a Rabbit, A Fly or 
a Human Clown...

TIL never was created! It always has been and it always will be. It only 
changes it forms and what these forms do. Most often specific Energies of 
TIL go to sleep and dream. In those dreams all things are possible and 
that is why we as Human Beings exist in the first place. It's an 
Experimental Dream and changes itself according to the Awareness that is 
available in the particular dream-forms TIL finds itself. IOW: We are TIL 
or The Creator dreaming that we are Man or Human. In actuality, physical 
reality is nothing but the smallest whiff of thin energy. We are 99.9999% 
emptiness. We are Energy Fields that have relationships with other Energy 
Fields. These Energy Fields are of an unlimited variety, and many of them, 
we as Human Beings are not capable of noticing. We are very limited in what 
we experience in and of our unlimited surroundings...

See the Universe as an Ocean of Energy in which we swim and notice all 
kinds of other swimmers. This ocean always existed but changes its 
inhabitant according to its particular desires and needs. We are like 
fishes not even noticing the ocean or water around us.

Here is the short answer to your questions:
What is God? 
Everything that exist is God/TIL.
What creates God! Not who. 
God or TIL always existed! It IS It IS!

Another answer here: 
God is created by Human Thought. IOW: God is a Concoction of the Human Mind. 
A God like that only exist in the human mind. A fantasy!! The God of the 
Bible for example is a human fantasy in which this God speaks to people in 
a certain language. Nonsense!

Are we the form? 
Yes, we are one form of TIL or this God. TIL or God is all forms of Life. 
There is an article on my Pages called: Introduction and Summation. This 
article deals with the questions you asked. There are many other articles 
on my pages and actually nobody ought to ask questions before they have 
read all the material on my Pages. Just kidding here! Go for it...
A lot of people put me on a higher pedestal that they are on. 
I would like them to take me off mine and put me on theirs. 
It's easier to communicate that way.

Light... Love... and Laughter. ~ Gerardus ~


Date: Tue, 04 May 1999 08:59:27 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: [TriLite] Re: "Self" protection (the Higher kind)

John here: 
I can just imagine the scenario should you and your lady be confronted by a 
couple of mugger rapists on a dark avenue late at night as you return from the 
theatre: "I'ts OK honey, relax, I'm going to talk to them and apply to their
higher selves." ) 

Gerardus here: 
Destiny is determined by the individual! To me this means that we avoid 
certain situations by consciously planning and mentally protecting 
ourselves from situations we do not want to be confronted with. Criminals 
and their buddies for example. However, as long as we have a gun or other 
weapons in the house, we (might) think that our destiny depend on defending 
ourselves with a gun. Well, it probably does... for now...

Our destiny is determined by the Principles of Mind - Conscious Awareness. 
It means that we will experience what we are about. If we are Light and 
Love, in the long run, we will NEVER meet criminals and the like. Yes, we 
know that they are there, but they and their so called victims, are the 
ones who have not learned the lessons of Life yet. 

In some cases, there are Karmic Situations that need to be met. No possible 
gun or earth defense system works here anyway. So why bother? 

John here: 
Have you read that, in Tibet, even the dedicated passivist Buddhists finally 
took up guns when they eventually realized that their survival was at 
Of course, by then, it was too late. John

Gerardus here: 
Most of us are not aware enough to know the Karmic Situations of someone or 
a people, therefore, we cannot say that it is too late or too early. We 
just don't know. 

Life is very complex and reaches back into many ages of our own missed 
marks. Why keep missing them?

I did not say that all this is easy - Gerardus


To: ! TriLite@0nelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Datre answers Gerardus

To All TriLiters...
Quite a while ago I sent some questions to John S. for Datre to answer. For those
not familiar with "Datre" - they are a group of Entities who live beyond what we call 
consciousness. Before I heard about them, I thought that the entire Universe, high 
and low, was consciousness and that there was nothing beyond that. Not according 
to datre. In any case, here are my questions and their answers. Possibly, we will
 all have more questions about their answers and if so, we could discuss them 
and/or send them to Datre... 


Datre answers Gerardus.
JOHN; Today we have some questions from Gerardus and his first question 
is... "You have told us that your group lives in the big universe, as you 
call it. Is this "area" beyond the energy of consciousness?"
DATRE; Yes it is. It is beyond the area of consciousness as you know it. 
The consciousness the you have within the physical construct is strictly 
for your body use - we don't have bodies, it would not be anything we could 

We have more, what you would call, an 'awareness'. But, our 'awareness' 
would be different than your 'awareness', because of that which you call 
body and we who have no body. So, there is a distinct difference, because 
functioning without a body can not be explained because you have nothing 
you can equate it to. All you can equate to, is 'physicality' and anything 
related to physicality. Even that which you call 'out-of-body' experiences 
are still related to physicality. That which you call 'death' is related to 
physicality. You see, everything that you would experience, in this 
construct, is related to physicality. Continue.

JOHN; And he goes on with... "Is there more than Consciousness in the 

DATRE; Very definitely! You see, consciousness is... well lets put it this 
way. You're all wanting to go out into the big Universe - eventually. 
Whether you do it through this physical experience 'this' time or the next 
time or ten thousand years from now, or whatever numbers you want to put on 
it, that is the evolutionary drive, is to be out there. It gives you 
something to strive for. So, lets put it this way... in functioning in 
physicality, you have been given a new bicycle with training wheels. What 
you're trying to do, is become proficient enough at riding the bicycle, to 
be able to take off the training wheels.

Now, there are those that will say, 'I know that I don't belong in this... 
in physicality, that I have an awareness of having been someplace else' or 
whatever. There are those that have that remembrance. The thing is, they're 
striving for that again. But, many loose sight of what is 'here' for you to 
learn, because that's what you came here for.

But, consciousness is something that you're using now. Consciousness, as 
you proceed in your evolution, will turn into 'awareness' - which is a 
different 'type' of understanding than consciousness. Awareness works from 
an entirely different principle. You will reach a certain stage in your 
evolution where you'll begin to notice a distinct 'difference' and you will 
begin to work from the point of 'awareness'. That will change your life 
considerably. That does not mean that the consciousness that's within the 
physical construct is not going to be there, but you will function more and 
more without it and 'develop' awareness. Continue.

JOHN; He continues with... "Is there Life beyond Consciousness?"

DATRE; Very definitely! If that were not true, then we would not be here to 
speak to you. You see, there's a difference between Consciousness and MASS 
CONSCIOUSNESS and all 'other' different kinds of consciousness. But, that 
is only a physical construct that you work with. Continue.

JOHN; His next question is... "What is consciousness? Is it a certain 
Energy with a certain range of vibration?"

DATRE; No, it is something that was put into the bodily construct. In your 
development of your physical construct, many things were introduced into 
the physical body. When you worked beyond the point of a 'cloned' reality, 
that's when consciousness was introduced. This is stretching the statement 
a little bit far, but look at consciousness as a 'connection' between 'you' 
and your Entity.

In other words, that which you call consciousness is that portion of you 
that is connected to the YOU that 'you' are and allows you to explore 
different realities through your 'Aspect' selves. It is your means of 
connection to your 'Aspects' by way of the YOU that 'you' are.

You can only access other realities that contain some of your 'Aspects'. If 
you do not have an 'Aspect' in a reality, you can not go there. All three 
('you', the YOU that 'you' are and your 'Aspects') are greater when these 
connections are made, but not 'less' in not having these experiences. You 
can not be 'less', but you can be 'more'.

Consciousness is such an integral part of your bodily construct that you 
could not function without it. In other words, even in that which you call 
'death', you still carry that with you. That is a 'part' of physicality. 

JOHN; His next question asks... "Would it be to our advantage to ingest the 
so called White Gold or Etherium Gold powders as most likely was done by 
the Elite in the past?"

DATRE; Those decisions are strictly up to you as an individual. That is 
something concerning your body and what you do with your body is entirely 
up to you 'and' your body.

When you begin to 'realize' that you and your body are two separate 
constructs and work together as a 'team', you can ask your body if it 
'wants' and you will get a feeling within - yes or no. As you continue, 
some day the body will even speak back to you. But, at this point it will 
be a 'feeling' that you have whether its 'right' for you or 'wrong' for 
you. Your body knows what it 'needs' and what it wants. But, that is one 
thing that most people don't do anything about. 'Oh, I'm hungry, I think 
I'll have a hamburger'. Is that what your body wants? Ever think about 
'asking' the body? Maybe the body would rather have something else - after 
all 'its' the one being fed, not 'you'. But, because its simple to jump 
into the car and get a hamburger, that's what you think about or whatever 
you get. 'Well, I think I'd like'. But, is it what the body likes?

See, the body definitely has ideas of what it wants - especially now, when 
so many changes are taking place within the bodily construct. 
You see, you figure that you read an article someplace and it says, 'for 
this, this and this, you need such and such a vitamin' or 'you need such 
and such a medication'. 'Well, I've got those symptoms, so therefore I must 
need this or I must need that or I must need something else'. But, if you 
got to the point of asking the body, the body would tell you.

So, I'm sure that all of the medications that peoples are taking now, the 
body is saying, 'what are you giving that to me for now, when I'm trying to 
make adjustments? And you're stuffing me with all this medication that I 
don't want. You're shutting off a lot of the things that I'm trying to do.'
Your body is 'carbon based' at the present time. You are in the process of 
changing 'this' body into a "silica" based body. Now, where do you get 
"silica" from in your body? You get it in your sinus cavities. That's what 
all this 'sinus' business is about. And yet, 'oh, my sinuses are bothering 
me, I'll go take a pill and I'll feel better'. What you've said to the body 
is, 'I'm running the show, I'm shutting you down'. The thing is, that just 
compounds the problem. You need to allow the body its freedom to 'make' the 
changes - you all want to make changes, you all want to evolve. But the 
body is 'evolving' too. The body has 'it's' evolution, you have 'your' 
evolution, but if you work as a 'team' it sure works a lot better.

So, if you want to take something, ask the body if it wants it. That's your 
best answer. You see, your 'teacher' is your body. Now, 'you' are to train 
the body in many areas and work 'with' the body, but don't 'shove' things 
at the body that the body doesn't want. Continue.

JOHN; And his final question is... "Is it indeed possible to feed our body 
a certain form of matter and reach a state of awareness that would propel 
us into the Fifth Dimension making our body invisible to third dimensional 

DATRE; No, there is not. Now, that is within the bodily construct that can 
be developed. But, you have to have a certain amount of 'awareness' to be 
able to develop anything like that. It would not be to your advantage, to 
take a 'pill' and be able to become 'invisible' on this planet. Have you 
thought what would happen if you did such a thing? You're still 'here'. 

You're still viable in a physical construct, even if you are 'invisible' to 
others on this planet and you walk across the street and get hit by a car, 
and you're dead, because they could not 'see' you. But, where have you 
gone? You've gone no place but to the dead zone.
You see invisibility, living in this construct, is not anything that's 

JOHN; Invisibility does not change your 'viability'.
DATRE; Not one bit. Absolutely not. The only time that you can change 
anything, is when you're to the point of 'awareness' where you know 'what' 
you're doing. There are those that 'can' make themselves invisible. But, 
they do it with discretion. They do it for very short periods of time. They 
do it under circumstances where they know the physical construct is safe. 
But, that comes from 'knowing' what they're doing. It isn't something that 
you can take a 'pill' for. It is a process of 'evolution'. Continue.

JOHN; That was the last question.

DATRE; All right, we thank you, we are Datre.


Date: Thu, 03 Jun 1999 09:37:49 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Re: [TriLite] Yada

From: Gerardus 

Mahrouk here: 
G-man would you try :) to explain your conversation with Yada.

Gerardus here: 
That's an easy one! 
I did not have a conversation with Yada. 

A few month ago, I sent in questions to John S. for Datre to answer. The 
questions were answered in the latest Datre Channeling. 

Mahrouk here: 
There is something beyond Consciousness? What IS Consc.??

Gerardus here: 
Yes, those were two of my questions and they answered them. Actually they 
did not tell me anything new. Just more details. However, it is next to 
impossible for us to understand what they speak of for we are not there 
yet. From what I have heard now, I gather that we live in a Bubble of 
Consciousness from which we cannot escape until our awareness has risen to 
limits that lie beyond the Ring-Pass-Not as the Yada people call it. (See 
"Yada Speaks" on my pages)

I figure that the continuum of Mind and Matter is what Datre calls the 
Energies of Consciousness and we live in it... and with it. Physical 
Bodies need this kind stuff to have their experiences in. These experiences 
awaken the Souls in them to a higher awareness level and when this level 
has risen high enough these Souls will be able to pass through the 

IOW: we live in an egg and we need to crack the shell. I also think/feel 
that intuition is the clue. As soon as we become fully intuitive we will 
break the shell and pass beyond the physical playpen... Guess who you will 

Mahrouk here: 
and how does this knowledge help me in my life today?

Gerardus here: 
I don't know how it could help you or anyone else. To me it sort of says: 
get your butt out of the rut and begin to think/meditate on what's beyond 
your shell. Pierce it so to speak. I guess Piers knows exactly what I am 
speaking of here. Comes down to forgetting about mastering the routine. 
All routines are but temporary delays to finding the Original. Yet, the 
Original will only awaken slowly by living the routine and its detours. 
These detours are the karma involvements we have with others - who are no 
one but ourselves for next time we live their life...

Trouble is, that since we all master the routine, we think we are a master 
for our reality is determined by following our routine. We are caught in a 
treadmill and we keep peddling the same route blindly for ages and ages 
until we awaken to what we truly are. What that is I don't know for words 
cannot describe it.
On the other hand, the One we truly are, is guiding us to Greatness. So, 
the trick is not to worry about anything but try to live a life of service 
and have fun while we're doing it. We all become what we must by being 
what we are... 

We are like fish in an aquarium and our greater Self has put us there. To 
me this means, that we need to trust our own Self for we are safe. It also 
means that we should not become too daring in spiritual or esoteric stuff 
for it could get us into more trouble that we could possibly think of. 

This means to rely on our own inner knowing and try to strengthen it before 
we follow some other Joker who think s/he knows what's good for us. In my 
view, it's better to make ten mistakes by ourselves than do it right the 
first time by listening to others. Failures and successes are lessons on 
the opposite end of the curriculum and both are necessary...

? My eggshell is invisible pink - what's yours like ?
Greetings with Love - Gerardus


Date: Fri, 04 Jun 1999 09:21:31 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Re: [TriLite] [Fwd: anti perspirants]

But seriously Mahrouk, where did this info come from? 
from a friend in Bombay. Don't know anything else. But i have known for 
years that anti perspirants are unhealthy and deodorants are kind of OK. 
The Cancer thing?? Who knows, One day it is coffee, another day 
suppressed anger, then smoking, then HRT, hereditary, and on and on. 
I think the truth is Cancer is a mystery ... 
Keep us posted on your research. 

Hi Mahrouk... 
I feel that Cancer is not a mystery. There are causes! Cancer might be an 
inner regret, an inner frustration about life itself. A question of "what 
am I really doing here and I might as well be dead". Lack of self-love! 

There also might be a dishonesty about oneself. Meaning - living with a 
false face. Do all this long enough and the body reacts. It reacts by 
manifesting cancer cells that in a slow way let you commit suicide. It's a 
lack of self responsibility based on ignorance. (God gives us lessons - 
that kind of stuff) Yes, sure, all kinds of other chemicals ALSO might 
give us/you something. 

Note: Happy people do not get Cancer... 
They just die laughing!

Honesty is the clue to Everything - not just a Virtue! 

Former Sinner - Future Saint - Gerardus.


Date: Fri, 04 Jun 1999 10:25:49 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Re: [TriLite] Yada/Datre

Gerardus here: 
IOW: we live in an egg and we need to crack the shell. 

Mahrouk here: 
is Consciousness an individual thing within each shell? 

Gerardus here: 
Yes! (And No) Consciousness knows how to divide and forget! 
We as Souls are aspects of an Unconscious Creator and we are engaged in a 
process of becoming individually conscious of our source as the Creator. 
The entire Creation in a sense is an awakening phenomenon and at the level 
of Mankind/Humanity it is possible to become aware that we have been asleep 
and are in the process of awakening...

The Awakening or Enlightenment is a Becoming of Age (knowledge and 
appreciation) of the Infinite Being We Are (Soul) in an Individual manner. 
The Creator itself will never awaken! It is busy creating - busy creating 
in an unconscious manner - asleep! It only awakens as the Created! So, in 
a sense, each atom, plant, mouse, horse or human, is aware of what it is - 
within the levels of their awareness/nervous system. This includes your 
favorite germ naturally. Not to forget your loving microbes... 

The entire universe then is an individualization of an unconscious Creative 
Force, which becomes aware of itself within its own aspects and diversity 
of creativity. Which naturally is unlimited or infinite. Within each 
aspect of creation the Creative Force is present AS that aspect. For human 
beings for example - it's our nature to create, for the Creator is present 
within us. We create whatever we may think of. We even create things we do 
not think of. IOW: things happen to us and then we say: what do you know - 
all this is not my fault! I was not even looking. God or the Devil did 
this! (Yada) There are no such "animals". We are here to learn that WE 
are responsible for all that happens to us and that our lives are 
self-created lessons of awakening. Eventually TIL will hit us! But many 
people hide within their Shell of Ignorance. They want to feel safe... 

Mahrouk here: 
Are plants and 
animals and rocks also within their individual shell? even germs and 
microbes???  how does this work?

The individual shell is our invisible pyjamas (ignorance) that we need to 
get rid of before we can reach the City of Awakening. Guess who is waiting 
for us with a cup of Java? 
Mahrouk here: 
I thought the physical world was ONE whopping egg ?

Gerardus here: 
Yes - it is. Humanity is the yolk! 
And within the yolk one finds a Joker. Guess who that goofer is? 
Then, the entire Universe is an even bigger Whopper. However within each 
Whopper there are little human whoppers and their hopping about teaches 
them the lessons of awakening. Presumably (I say presumably) we as human 
beings have gone through all the stages of microbes, germs, plants and 
animals, before we ever were born as a human being. IOW: the Eternal Spark 
or Soul has awakened now to reach its final stages of awakening on the 
Biological Path. 

My path is full of Jokes... How about yours?
Blessings and Smiles - Gerardus


Date: Mon, 07 Jun 1999 16:51:56 -0600
To: gerardus@telusplanet.net
From: Gerardus 
Subject: The Love/Light that's Mankind...

Awful good question! 

Gerardus here: 
I think/feel the best way to tell children about existence is not 
to mention the word God any longer but to use the word TIL. 
The Infinite Love. Or, The Infinite Light. It is this Love/Light 
that creates an inner Happiness within us. And sometimes a Sadness, 
for we need to experience both in order to become well adjusted 
Love/Lights ourselves. Love/Lights that shine when we see courage 
and/or doubt in others and Love/Lights that are graceful when we 
experience kindness in the most unexpected places. Like when a 
stranger smiles at us when we are momentarily paused between two 
thoughts. Or when we listen to the geese honking overhead. Or 
when we see a field of flowers softly waving in the wind. In 
these moments, the Love/Lights we are, understand that the 
entire World is The Infinite Light in Loving Action being itself. 
Especially within us in our moments of sharing... 

Also the following might help. 

From the Book: Creation - The Perfect Mirror 

Go here to read the original  <----<<

One morning on the bus... I said to Hank... 
you know Hank... my landlady's daughter Kalinda... 
is asking me questions. 

She's asked me where people come from... 
or how did we arrive on this Earth. 

What has God to do with all this... she said... 
and what about the Devil Muranda? 

What is God... and where is he... 
and who is the Devil? 

She's only a child... and very sensitive... 
I think she's ten years old... 
and you know Hank... she's beautiful! 

I do not like to tell her about Adam and Eve... 
or about apples and snakes... and paradise. 

What should I tell her Hank? 

Do you know what to tell her? 

And here is Hank..... 

- - - - - - - 

At one time Kalinda... 
a very long time ago when the Earth was very young... 
and the air was still crystal clear... 
there were only animals on the Earth. 

There were also trees... and flowers... and lakes... 
and many mountains and seas... 
and many... many fishes. 

All this was created and taken care of... 
by the Love/Light of Beauty and its many Spirits. 

Everything was beautiful... 
and the whole Earth was a Garden of Beauty. 

And then Kalinda... 
at some time in the history of the World... 
a very Wise Love/Light looked upon the Earth. 

And the longer it looked upon the Earth... 
the sadder it became. 

You see Kalinda... 
this Wise Love/Light was sad... 
because it didn't see any Children... 
or loving Parents. 

It circled all around the Earth... 
but this Wise Love/Light couldn't find any People. 

And then Kalinda... slowly... very slowly... 
this Wise Love/Light knew how to solve the problem. 

The Idea was to create people... 
and especially... beautiful Children. 

This Love/Light with its Great Wisdom... 
and its many different Thoughts... 
carefully surrounded the Earth. 

And before long... 
every nook and cranny of the Earth... 
was filled with Beautiful Thoughts of the Wise Love/Light. 

And then... with Great Love for Creation... 
and with Brilliant Imagination and Feelings of Tenderness... 
this Wise Love/Light and its many Thoughts... 
slowly became all the People of the Earth. 

Every Thought became a different Human Being. 

Then... there were Mothers and Fathers... 
and Aunts and Uncles... 
and above all Kalinda... 
there were many... many Children. 

Many People of the Earth... 
were of a different colour... 
and many had different hair styles. 

But all of them were Friendly and Beautiful! 

All the Children joyfully danced upon the Earth... 
and all the animals were their friends. 

But you know what Kalinda... you know what happened? 

The Wise Love/Light had completely disappeared... 
the Wise Love/Light... couldn't be found anywhere. 

However... all the Thoughts of the Wise Love/Light... 
had become the People of the Earth. 
And the Eyes of the People... 
reflected this Wise Love/Light in Person. 

The Wise Love/Light was alive... 
within each Mother... within each Father... 
and within all the Children and People of the Earth. 

The Wise Love/Light... had become Man! 

It was the Greatest Miracle ever... 
and the whole Universe was amazed and mystified. 


For a long... long time... 
all the People of the Earth lived very happily together... 
and all the Children played... 
with the beautiful animals. 

Everybody on Earth knew... 
that all the People... really were... 
the Wise and Thoughtful Love/Light. 

They were the Life of this Wise Love/Light... alive as People. 

And then there came a time... 
in which the People of the Earth... 
started to use their Imagination... 
and they created different things for different purposes. 

And then slowly... they began to forget where they came from. 

Pretty soon... nobody remembered... 
that they were the Wise Love/Light in Person. 

They started to make up different stories and legends... 
about how they had become the People of Earth. 

They filled up their Forgetfulness... 
with Scientific Nonsense and Fear. 

Many People looked for their Creator in Books... 
instead of in their Hearts. 

They thought that their Love/Light lived in Books.. 
and the Books became more important that the People. 

And then Kalinda... People started to fight... 
because some People thought that the Love/Light in their Book 
was better... 
than the Love/Light in the Books of other People. 

Some leaders of the People... 
began to make up their own stories about Love/Light... 
and they started their own Religions... 
and tell the People many things that were not true. 

The Preachers of the Religions... 
became completely confused... 
while they thought that they were wise. 

Pretty soon... the whole world became confused... 
and nobody knew who or what they were anymore. 

They began to fear each other... 
and created very dangerous weapons... 
to fight other People. 

The People of the Earth became insane... 
but nobody knew it... because they were all the same. 

The whole Universe... and the People of other Planets... 
became very concerned. 

And all this happened... 
while all along the Love/Light... 
who became all the People of the Earth... 
lived in the Hearts of all the People. 

You see Kalinda... 
the Wise Love/Light that lives in our Hearts... 
can only speak with a very tiny voice... 
and it is difficult to hear sometimes. 

And also you see... people were so busy living and fighting... 
that they had no time to listen to the voice within. 

Anyway Kalinda... 
the True Love/Light... who became Mankind... 
speaks right from within your Heart. 

Its Voice is very soft. 

Once in a while... 
you can hear the tiny Voice of the Wise Love/Light... 
if you listen carefully for a while. 

You see Kalinda... you are this Love/Light... in Human Form. 
You are this Love/Light... Forever. 

Every Father... every Mother... 
and every Child on Earth... is... 
this Love/Light... their own way. 

The Wise Love/Light... that looked upon the Earth... 
is... the very Race of Mankind. 

While all the Deities... of all the Religions... 
are Man-Made... and False! 

You Kalinda... you are the Wise Love/Light and True Spirit... Alive. 
Just the way you are. 

So now then... you can truly be happy and celebrate... 
because you know who you really are. 

You can also be happy for all your Friends and other People... 
because they are this Wise Love/Light as well... we all are. 

The trouble is Kalinda... 
that so very few People know that this is so. 

This is what the Devil is Kalinda... 
the Devil is the Forgetfulness and Ignorance... 
of the People of Earth. 

Many People are all mixed up... 
because the Preachers they listened to... 
confused them. 

People think that their Love/Light is some other Force. 

So Kalinda... this Wise Love/Light... who lives in your Heart... 
is what you truly are. 

And your Intuition will help you... 
to listen to the tiny Voice within. 

The tiny Voice speaks softly about your Greatness... 
and it whispers... about your Love for Mankind. 

This tiny Voice within... is willing to help you... 
but you know Kalinda... you cannot hear this tiny Voice... 
when you watch TV... or when you listen to the radio. 

You have to listen very quietly and maybe close your eyes. 

You are the reality of this Wise Love/Light... 
all by yourself. 

This Wise Love/Light and its sharing... lives in your Heart. 

You are this Peaceful Reality... expressed in the Beauty you are. 

You are the Expression of Beauty. 

You are the Actuality of Love and Light! 

- - - - - - - 

When Hank had finished the story... 
I just sat there... stunned... and undone. 

I couldn't speak... and I felt like crying. 

And you know... 
Hank went a stop too far... 
because he wanted to finish the story. 

And when he got up to leave... I could see tears in his eyes. 
He hardly said good bye... because he cried. 

I felt such great Love for this Man... 
that I cried as well. 

Great big tears trickled down my face. 

The Love I felt... was the Wise Love/Light crying... 
for what it had become. 

Man... the Insane Fool! 

Yet... I knew... 
that everything was alright... 
for the World is a Wonderful School. 

A School in which all People... Sane or Insane... 
are learning to become... Crystal Clear in Knowing. 

We all are Students of Life. 

Some of us... just seem to learn a little faster... 
while Others give us the opportunity... 
to grow Love in our Hearts. 

All of us are... the Wise Love/Light... 
living... loving... and laughing. 

o o o o o o o o 


Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 07:01:48 -0600 
To: TriLite@onelist.com 
From: Gerardus  
Subject: Re: [TriLite] What is important
At 04:38 PM 1999/06/09 +0200, you wrote: 

Gerardus wrote: 

Do not be concerned with the masses of the world. You are not here to save 
it or change it. All is Well! You have to consider whether YOU are moving 
closer to the Light. Only YOU are important, while the world is but the 
scenery within which you are here to enlighten the Soul you are... 

Are we becoming more or less aware? Who cares? 
Are YOU becoming more aware? That's the question! 

Thanks Gerardus for reminding me! I know it to be true, but I keep forgetting 
it when reading the papers and watching TV. 
I will put it on my desk and read it every morning, because I completely agree 
with you that this is the only thing to worry about. 
Awareness does the trick!!! 



Hi Gerard... 
Experience creates Awareness and Awareness automatically produces Love. 
When we are aware we realize that we are all climbing the same mountain 
but find ourselves at different levels. All climbers are but one Being 
climbing the mountain different ways. This one Being is Love in Action 
expressing itself in the many we think we see... 

This makes me think about the poem I wrote a long time ago. 

Here it is: 


The Mountain I am on... 
is not of this World. 
It's full of Pitfalls and Darkness. 

There are no other Climbers... 
no Footsteps... no Path. 
For this is a Private Mountain. 

I'm supposed to climb it... 
but nobody told me so. 
I've never seen this Mountain before 
for most of it is within me. 

Where the Top is... I do not know. 
But once I reach it... 
I will have found myself. 

What I will be like... 
is reflected in my Path. 

The Darkness on this Mountain... 
seems stronger than the Soul I am. 
And sometimes I don't even know... 
whether I'm going up or down. 

Not even God can help me... 
for THAT... is what I have to find. 
That's why I'm lonely and longing... 
for the Eternal Mirror on the Top. 

The Mirror will show me... 
the God I am 
in the Light I project. 


Thank you for your kind words Gerard! 
Namaste - Gerardus 


Date: Sat, 10 Jul 1999 15:04:37 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Delivered-To: mailing list TriLite@onelist.com
Reply-to: TriLite@onelist.com
Subject: Re: [TriLite] About Datre...

Paul here:
Hi Gerardus and everyone, 
One of Datre's most important themes is that we are not our body. Which 
would mean that we are spirit. In evolutional terms we are consciousness. 
Consciousness evolves or expands through temporary bodies. Planets in our 
solar system are bodies of our solar system in very much the same way as our 
bodies are bodies of human beings. 
We live in a body, planetary as well as human. In order to experience to the 
fullest extent we exhaust all the experiences obtainable through a body 
before changing it for a new body. Likewise we exhaust all the experiences 
obtainable through a planet before changing it for a new planet. Bodies and 
planets are simply means for the evolution of consciousness that we are. 
Physical birth is a symbol of birth of consciousness. A new birth into a 
body is always an important or rather critical part of the process of 
evolution of consciousness so much so that it marks the beginning of a 
higher level of consciousness.

Hi Paul... Hi Everyone... 

Glad you jumped in here Paul. I'm not sure what's happening, I have either 
risen to your level of thinking or you write at my level of understanding. 
Whatever it is - you described the Mechanics of Consciousness in simple and 
beautiful words. No doubt it is Love doing it Thing! 

We are where our Consciousness is. (Yada)
Namaste - Gerardus


Date: Tue, 13 Jul 1999 19:17:01 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Re: [TriLite] Wonderful Day Today!

Ken here: 
 big game. Ha ha...you thought I was going to be my gross little self. 

Think again.
 My question is this: where does spirituality end and psychology 
 begin? Or vice versa. Or are they actually the same? OK, that may sound 
 confusing, but it seems as if there is this struggle to understand ourselves 
and each other in order to understand something that might be higher than 
ourselves. OK, that's it. Any opinions? 
Just trying to roll the ball, Ken

Bev here: 
Wellllllll, good question Ken, 
Psychology is of the mind/body rotating throughout self creating and 
recreating self and affecting daily functions of brain and organs as our 
spiritual aspect awaits to see if our psychological self listens to our 
spiritual self to create our well being or if it needs to continue as a 
duplication of mass most like what we hear, see, feel on our physical level, 
to determine the physical breakdown or renewal of cells. The awakened 
spiritual self holds the key to karma and immortality. 
Does this make sense to anyone else?

Gerardus here: 
Perfectly self explanatory - except for my eye balls flying back and forth 
in order to catch the connection between the words of that long sentence. 
Did it escape me? I thought that I had a fit! Wow... 

Seriously, what really threw me was "the mind/body rotating throughout self 
creating and recreating self affecting the daily functions of brain and 
organs" - (my words now)--- while my spiritual self just sits there 
polishing its Halo trying to get a word in edge wise. Poor Soul - what a 

I thought that the Soul or Psyche was the one who set up the entire deal in 
the first place. Live of die, I'm with you body. And whatever you 
experience I take with me as my catch for your efforts. Hmmm. Remember? I 
am the fisherman. Thanks anyway body - you could not help it that you were 
so dense, it was my fault all along. I should have created a genius and get 
it over with...

Trouble is now, I do not really know whether I am making fun of myself, or 
of Bev., or am sincerely trying to grab the jest of life being spiritual 
with a psychological make up of a rotating mind/body trying to catch my 
tail which is worth about two cents in the process of keeping the ball 
rolling... Touch Down anyway!

I know what you say Bev. It's just about as tough to roll up and store it 
somewhere as some of Paul's words. Point is, I have trouble grabbing it 
and say "got you"... 

What I do understand is this: 
*The awakened spiritual self holds the key to karma and immortality*. 
Absolutely! So many of us aren't there yet though...

Sometimes Saint - sometimes Nuts - sometimes Losing It.
The Eternal Teaser Trying - Gerardus


Date: Sun, 18 Jul 1999 09:51:28 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
Subject: Re: [TriLite] Something that's worthwhile doing IMO

Margaret here: 
You and I can help... 
I have found a website that has large corporate sponsors who will 
donate one meal a day each day we log on. 
Needless to say, I have book marked it and plan to visit it each day. 
It only takes one minute to log on and click. 
Please pass this on to your friends - we can make a difference. 
This isn't a joke or a chain 
This site has gotten great press from USA Today, CNN, Radio, and Yahoo ... 
sounds like a wonderful idea to us! 
Wouldn't you like to be able to feed the hungry for FREE?

Gerardus here: 
Yes, I have clicked that button for the first and last time! And here are 
my reasons:
To feed the hungry in the world is not as simple as just bringing them a 
meal or two a day. In no time they bring all their working neighbors who 
now stand in line with them to receive the free food. Standing in line for 
food is easier than working for it. In ten, fifteen years or so, the entire 
crowd of two billion has multiplied to four or five billion for all the 
children saved, now have their own families standing in line. The masses 
of mankind are that way. They multiply without regards of the consequences, 
especially when they have nothing else to do now...

The fact that the press from USA Today, CNN, Radio, and Yahoo finds this a 
wonderful idea just proves that they uttered a self affirmation of 
stupidity for they also belong to the mass mind. The mass mind cannot solve 
the problems of the mass mind! Only individuals within the mass mind can 
do that - one at the time!

Life is a long journey with self-responsibility as it goal and the only way 
this responsibility can be obtained is as Mother Nature or the Creative 
Force is doing it now. Millions suffer and die and eventually a single 
Christ arises - all by its own power of determination and 
self-responsibility. There are no long term free rides in Life and neither 
is their a free trip to arrive at the Christ level. Life is a do it 
yourself Job...

We are all born into places and circumstances that coincide with our 
feelings. We are feeling beings of which some have learned to think. The 
rest lives unconsciously! Many people are born into situations that shocks 
them into awareness... 

To help the poor and hungry other solutions have to be found. However, we 
in this world have not come far enough to implement them. We are still too 
religious and too destructive. The Mass Mind is Insane!

There is a fine line between sharing and divine selfishness - Gerardus


Date: Tue, 20 Jul 1999 07:07:50 -0600
Subject: [TriLite] A Collection of Attitudes...

Ken here: 
 Our souls are not cleaner. We are not our circumstances. 

Evin here: 
I agree (except I don't believe in a personal soul). I do believe we are 
responsible for building (or letting crumble) our character, though. 

Gerardus here: 
Got you Evin! 
Life is a Belief-Issue I feel. It certainly is what you believe it to 
be. To me this means that what you believe goes! 

If you believe that you do have a personal Soul - you do! 
If you believe that you have no personal Soul - you have not! 

!! Must likely the Soul has YOU in both cases !! 

And yes, naturally we are responsible for our character. It's the 
'energy' we are and are born with again and again. This is what I 
believe OR think I know. (Is there a difference there?) 

What we are is: "A Collection of Attitudes" towards our experiences. 
Of which almost all are self-created, either out of 
ignorance/unconsciousness or by means of conscious living. My 
experiences float somewhere in between. Slowly but surely we move 
towards conscious living but it is a hard thing to do. I catch myself 
many times a day! Where is my wallet? What happened to my slippers? 
How come the car is unlocked? I can't find my pen. Did you get you 
hair done?? 

Working on it - Gerardus 


Date: Tue, 20 Jul 1999 10:34:26 -0600
From: Gerardus 
Subject: [TriLite] Gerardus' Guides.

Salute to all TriLiters...

About my Guides:
More than twenty years ago I had a Life-Reading and the energies told me 
that I have seven Guides or Helpers. They like to be called Guides 
naturally - especially mine. They probably suffer my ego problem and my 
drive for neatness. Anyway, there are seven! And here is what I feel they 

1) A Philosopher with an enormous amount of knowledge which slowly slips 
into my skull in the form of words when I stay out of the way. The 
interpretation is a bit sharp maybe, but that's because I am trying too 
hard. My Philosopher smiles about it. This Guide is a very persuasive 
energy and does not bother itself with drivel unless it's funny. Actually 
it has no choice in the matter. It allows...

2) A poet with a soft heart for that's where it speaks from. Nice Entity 
for sure! It keeps its words very simple for the scribe is a very simple 
instrument. He never had a sophisticated education, for when he was young 
he was more interested in girls than books. He liked to twirl their hair 
and stuff. This Guide has a perfect meter when it writes, but it has a bit 
of trouble knowing when to stop. It has no problem with distance however 
for it knows exactly where I live. No mean feat...

3) A scientist who caught a few universal facts here and there and tries to 
translate them into today's language scientists might understand. Since 
this energy is baffled by his own discoveries, he figures that 1 + 1 = 2 
is an enormous celebration. Point is, how does he know that there is not a 
very small fraction attached to either 1 (one). How could that make 2 
(two)? Since the scientist has a non-denominational attitude I give him 
credit for trying to work through a noisy container while dictating. I 
hope you do too...

4) A Master of all trades. She is a feminine actuality and therefore tries 
to convince me to take it easy on something that's broken. If it's broken 
she says, take it easy. It's already hurting! No doubt my trying to fix 
everything comes from this great master. I would not know what to do 
without her. She is right and left handed and I love her. No doubt she was 
a beautiful crafts person at one time with electrical overtones. Funny 
thing she does not know how to cook. Tough Cookie...

5) An Irish Clown and Comedian. He used to be a funny guy in good old 
Ireland. Too bad he lost his funny bones in a battle of wits when he was 
not looking. Since then he keeps his eyes open when he speaks. Actually I 
like him the best for he makes me laugh. Hope you have met him a few times. 
Words flow easy from this energy and I have trouble catching them. Maybe I 
should use professional baseball mitts. Use a net he says... use a net...

6) A very old Priest who used to pull stunts at Rome. He made money for the 
Church! He still wears his toga and he used to make his own underwear. He 
is precise like an Atomic Clock. Trouble is, nobody knows where he comes 
from and/or what stunts were his best. That's probably why I have trouble 
getting his point. In the mean time, I agree with him a lot, for if not, he 
begins to wave his finger. Hate that finger...

7) The beautiful Indian energies is my last Guide. If I ever had to do 
without them I would be devastated for they have been with me since before 
they were born for the first time. They never tried to explain that to me, 
for they know that I already know how that works. They are so beautiful 
that it makes me cry when I think about them. They never speaks louder 
than a whisper. No doubt these energies are the master of all my Guides. I 
am their favored instrument for somehow they live me, without letting me 
know it. That's why I still think/feel that I am Gerardus. Which naturally 
is not so. All of us are The Infinite Light! Gerardusses are first class 

Notes to the above: 
Since these Guides live beyond space/time their thoughts project 
simultaneously. That means they all speak at once! It makes my energies 
spin and nothing gets done. I need a sync system that discerns the small 
nuances between the frequencies of their thoughts. I'm shopping for one but 
even Panasonic thinks I am asking for the impossible. What do they know? 

Oh yes, my Indian Guide whispered: "If you think you know you are the 
Universe, why bother to spill the beans on a few Guides". It baffled me 
and I'm still working on that one! 

Are these Guides real? 
Are You real?  Are Thoughts real?  Is the Universe real?

That's all for now Lights - Gerardus


Date: Tue, 20 Jul 1999 21:34:52 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Re: [TriLite] sorta venting

Sam I Am Here"
To G and all, 
Something tells me that the reason we can't see or otherwise 
fully sense TIL or our Higher Selves or God or Whatever is very 
simply because we are analog beings in a digital universe. The 
very basis of the universe is Being and Action, Black and White, 
Light and Dark, Yin and Yang, call it what you will, it is 1 and 
0, on and off, is and isn't. An subatomic particle is positive or 
negative, strange or warm or one of dozens of analog words for 
their state of being. But I trust in one axiom, that for every 
state there is an opposite state. 
Now we get projected from the Digital Master (:-), in which we 
are all One (as opposed to Zero) as analog constructs with a 
memory-based need to be of one mind but no way to achieve it in 
an analog world. So we work and strive to invent devices and 
improve our genetics to invent better devices to achieve 
real-time mass communication, i.e. a state of One Mind. But in 
the process, we are using analog body-minds to do it, so the 
results are wildly unpredictable. Thus we have radio, CB radio, 
TV, myriad telephones, Internet, snail mail, and many other means 
of communicating with people beyond our physical reach. 
From where we sit as the Digital Master watching this analog 
display, it is infinitely fascinating as we struggle delightedly 
to translate the analog events into their digital probabilities 
so we can witness the Field of All Possibilities in full digital 
The instant one of our analog constructs ceases to function, our 
point of consciousness in that body returns to digital awareness, 
though perhaps that awareness is colored by its state of analog 
awareness, i.e. its beliefs. Precisely what we believe may be 
less important than our belief in and acceptance of What Is. With 
such openness of spirit maybe we are better able to fully return 
to digital consciousness with immediate and complete access to 
all memory (which in a digital universe is never forgotten, only 
the pointers to it are lost). 
Just as physicists have come to recognize the overwhelming 
presence of Universal Intelligence; some of them even call it 
God, we seeking spiritual answers might look to the world of 
science for clues as well. After all, the only separation between 
science and spirit is the idea of separation.

Gerardus here: 
Great stuff Sam! Something to ponder about... 

Often I feel that we are Energy-Particles and that the universe is 
Energy-Waves. We are surrounded by these waves and can't touch nor 
comprehend it for we do not recognize them. These Waves naturally are 
incognito in a space/time scenario. We used to be Waves and have changed 
into Particles. We ended up in a self created time/space reality. We have 
trouble finding our way out and also are oblivious to who or what we really 
are. We continually use particles to measure waves. The apples and oranges 
got us! It looks to me that we have stepped through ourselves while we 
were not looking and time/space became real to us. How do we step back 
through ourselves again? I think/feel that we are looking in the wrong 
closet and use the wrong measuring stick to boot...

Where is the Wave Closet and the right measuring stick - Gerardus


Date: Fri, 23 Jul 1999 07:37:51 -0600
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Re: [TriLite] Gerardus' Guides 

From: Gerardus 

Hi Helga! 
John here... I recently questioned Dr. Evin about souls in which 
he stated "that I don't believe in" them. I asked if he had "looked at 
soul is" (as commonly thought of) and then rejected "it" - the belief in 
souls. His reply was in the affirmative AND he then expressed his concept 
"spirit" which is the same concept of spirit as I have held for lo' these 
many years. I have recently finished reading Journey of Souls, by Dr. 
Michael Newton and much of what is reported in his case studies of subjects 
while in trance (hypnosis) is very "intellectually palatible" (easy to 
as valid) but I cannot make the "personalized character of a soul" -- as he 
describes them, to fit in with my chosen understanding of spirit. Evin 
relates that, in his concept, the individuals spirit is analagous to a cup 
of water being returned to the ocean. This has also been how I considered 
to "operate" -- it's a harmonious (I think) concept with that of the 
holographic structure of the universe. I think it also conforms to the idea 
of spirit, Mind, that de Jardin, (I think it was), who described what he 
called the noosphere ... a "belt", or, zone of, the spiritual dimension 
contains ALL mentality, ideas, thoughts - expressed or un-expressed. 
What puzzles me -- and makes definition of my "belief" (which is yet to be 
formed) so difficult, is that I personally have had "deja vu" experiences 
and also, the opposite of deja vu -- recollections of past events, feelings, 
etc., that could ONLY be defined as occurring outside of the "ocean of 
spirit" formulation. I.e., there is, for me, some individualized, 
personality and character that appears to be "me" that has been there, done 
that, or he development of an experiential situation with a 
predetermined understanding of how it will "play out" (deja vu). 
Maybe you can help me reconcile these conflicting understanding / 
(Evin left me a bit confused -- and very contemplative, when he stated that 
he "looked at" (the concept of, I think), soul, and rejected it. I think 
that I would have the same understanding if it weren't for the dilemma posed 
by the recall of past "events" and the deja vu stuff. (Of course, I do NOT 
recall "past events" as such -- it's the present experience having an 
intimately familiar "connection" with my inner spirit. My difficulty with 
Newton's explanations/revelations is that his subjects all related their 
"stories" in contemporary English language with modern idioms and 

IF the "Queen of Sheba" (fictitious analogy) was revealing through a 
hypnotized client; wouldn't she be speaking in a language that was 
at that time... rather than moden "slang"? (... and the modern language 
would be expressing stuff that had not yet been objectified.) Thus I cannot 
accept Newton's thesis as a personal belief -- tho' I don't doubt that his 
subjects were recalling "somethin" . Yahtahey! John

Hi John - Gerardus here:

This might help: 
Life is a do it yourself job. 
Life is what you believe it to be. 
The absolute truth is that there is only individual truth. 
You are the Creator in human form and are independent of souls and/or 
spirits or any other intermediate spiritual energy and/or higher self 
including all ideas others believe or declare to be their truth.

You are the Creator of your Truth!
Thought by Thought we create the entire universe from scratch!
All this means that we eventually must stop following what others say, 
think, proclaim to be so or die for.

All I can say is - You are IT!
The big IS in human form smiling - Gerardus


Date: Tue, 27 Jul 1999 18:44:11 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
Subject: Re: [TriLite] O.R.

Gerardus here: 
In any case, please give us your take on this "no objective reality" 
bit. IOW how does it work? 

Evin here: 
If objective reality didn't exist, I couldn't say, "If I drop my pen [and 
I am on this planet, and not floating in a no-gravity machine], it will 
fall." Yet, every human, regardless of culture or genetics, can do this. 
That's about as objective as it gets. And there's lots of these.

Gerardus here: 
We live in a sensory body. This to me means that our body's senses are able 
to make us believe that something is physically happening out there and 
takes place in what we call our physical reality. This also goes for 
someone who is hypnotized and is told that he is given an egg to eat. In 
actuality he is given an apple. No peep from the person who is hypnotized. 
How come? What I am suggesting here is that all of us are hypnotized by 
our senses and think that something physically is going on. In the mean 
time, we call this our objective reality. There is no such thing! 

There is universal energy (The Universal Mind) out there in which we live 
and have our being. Each of us determines from this universal energy what 
our own reality is. Some think they eat an egg and others see the person 
eat an apple. What really was it? A coconut? Who is to tell? The body 
and its senses deceives us from birth to death! 

There is no physical objective reality out there. There is only energy out 
there, from which we all create our own physical reality depending on our 
beliefs and our conditioning. All of us are hypnotized by our senses. They 
make a dream (mentality) become physical. The body's senses are lenses 
through which we look and think we see physical reality. Not so! To awaken 
from this illusion is included in the process... 

In the mean time this illusion is real - Gerardus


Date: Wed, 28 Jul 1999 08:50:36 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Re: [TriLite] Population control 

Helga here: 
HA,ha,HA, ha...... 
Whoever proclaimed population control or quotas pertaining thereto to be 
political??? ))) 
Could be very much spiritual........! 
Yeah, spiritual discussions on population control!!!!!!!!! 

Any suggestions, any talkers, any takers ?? 

Hi Helga - Gerardus here: 
I am in favor of a Selective Population Control (SPC). The "basics of this 
philosophy" are that only people who have proven to have some measure of 
self-responsibility will be allowed to start a family. And by some measure 
I mean, people who are able to take care of themselves at least, and/or can 
proof it by having money in the bank for example or worldly possessions in 
the form of a house, a cabin or maybe even a car that's been paid of.

The exact rules naturally need to be carefully chosen and adopted - first of 
all the principle needs to sink in. Children born outside of these 
guidelines will be given for mandatory adoption. If a surplus occurs, these 
children will be raised by communities at large based on voluntary help and 
government financing. This will cut down on "children raising children" and 
abortions. The accepted philosophies of today is the common sense of 

Self responsibility proves intelligence - Gerardus


Date: Fri, 30 Jul 1999 21:32:50 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
Subject: Re: Re[2]: [TriLite] Population control

From: Gerardus 
At 09:36 PM 1999/07/30 -0400, you wrote: 
From: Starbuilders  
 Illusion are real and exist. 
If illusions are real, what separates them from reality, or for that 
matter, unreality? 

Illusions and realities are the same thing. The only things REAL is the 
one who creates them and calls them what s/he likes - illusions or 
realities. Creations.

This REAL thing is what we all are - individually and en mass universally. 
The nature of the Universe or the Creator is just that way. It's us doing 
it and being it simultaneously. We always have been and once in a while we 
step out to create confusing situations to fool ourselves. We are tough on 
ourselves for we can afford it. We are the Light That Is. We are TIL ! 

There is no unreality - it's a human word without a meaning. Semantics...

We are the Creator dreaming and our dream is Creation as we know it - Gerardus


Date: Sat, 31 Jul 1999 12:10:24 -0600
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Final - "Selective Population Control" - Another look!

Hello All...
I opened my suggestion box and viola - another opinion about "Selective 
Population Control" rolled out. We have already 80 posts on this subject 
and I think it broke the record. In any case, here is the gist of my 
additional opinion:

Humanity is an enormous entity universally and mankind on earth is but a 
tiny aspect of the entire Universal Human Energy. We might even be the baby 
in the human family! No doubt our own human energy is important to us for 
we live our life as this energy. Humanness. Our way! My original idea or 
question I had in mind was - how can we improve upon the awareness level of 
the masses on our world and help them to propagate in a more responsible 
manner compared to what is going on now! After all I figured, there are 
other races of humanity on other planets and how did they get so smart and 
advanced? Why can't we do something about our own situation and improve 
things a bit here and there? 

People all over our world multiply and they are not capable of raising 
their families in what I would call a minimum level of sustenance and 
education. The result is that billions suffer! Naturally suffering is 
relative, but even so I figured, we at least should discuss this on TriLite 
and see what the general opinions are of our members. Well, as you know we 
have had all kind of excellent responses...

The world is a school into which we are born in order to participate in the 
awakening of the Creative Force We Are. How does this awakening take place? 
It takes place mostly by suffering and searching for the answers of what 
we really are and what we are doing here. It comes about by work, by 
studying and by being alert or consciously aware of what's going on with us 
and what our world and body is all about. We are here to awaken to our own 
Greatness! The more we awaken the more we create joy and are able to share 
it amongst ourselves. Each human being is the Creator in human form. Not 
just half the Creator or a small aspect of it! We Are The Whole Force! 

Now, this is my view at the moment and you may have a different one. That's 
fine with me...

IOW: we are not just an aspect of the Universe, we are The Universal Whole 
in human form. Living in a temporary body on a temporary world, which 
basically is a dream of the Creator We Are. We as this creator have 
stepped out into our dream and live now in our dream or creation in human 
bodies. It is the only way for us (the creator) to learn what our creation 
is all about and awaken to our creatorship! We as the creator created this 
world in an unconscious process and we are here to become aware of what we 
created and who or what we really are. Who did this to us?

While living in our creation we slowly become aware of why we are born and 
what Life in the flesh is all about. We have began this journey in a 
totally unconscious manner and the longer we live and the more experiences 
we have in our creation the more we become aware of what we really are and 
rejoice in this knowledge. We live in physical bodies and every time we are 
born at different times and places, we are hypnotized by the body and its 
senses, for we live in a sensory world. We are spirits with senses and our 
body and senses hypnotize us. We as spirits become completely absorb in 
the workings of the matter world and think that this matter world is 
something in and by itself. We also think that we are the body.

This is not so! 

Our creation and our body have come about by our thoughts we as 
spirits think. We are consciousnesses thinking! We think and emote our 
matter world and body into existence. They are illusions, however the fact 
that they are an illusion does not mean that they do not exist! The world 
and our bodies are as real as pain or joy.

Question is, how do we awaken from the unconscious state in which we as the 
Creator find ourselves? How do we begin when we find ourselves in a matter 
body for the first couple of times? Or maybe the first hundreds of times? 
I do not know for sure how many times we have to live before we start to 
ask ourselves these questions. It really does not matter for our births 
and deaths are but illusionary happenings to which we are subjected to by 
our senses. In actuality we all live in mind, the universal mind. We are 
this mind. We are the Creator's Mind! 

So, how does our awakening begin? 
I suggest that it begins by suffering the very creation we live in and we 
become aware of this slowly but surely lifetime by lifetime. Life in the 
body is difficult and most painful at first. We suffer our own ignorance 
and become caught up in our emotional attitudes and seem to choke on them 
once in a while. It hurts like Hell. Maybe it is Hell, who's to tell but 
ourselves in the long run...

So we seem to live many lifetimes and suffer a lot. We suffer the matter 
cross so to speak! Life then seem to be lived in births and deaths and 
seemingly we do this over and over again. However, there is only ONE Life! 
Our comings and goings are illusionary happenings. We only play different 
roles in the one Life we live. We play these roles in different places at 
different times. At the moment for example, I as a consciousness or spirit 
live in body called Gerardus and in some form or another Gerardus plays a 
role in his spirit's awakening and hopes to be able to help awaken a few 
other spirits. No mean feat, because no one can force or do anything really 
to awaken another spirit, for to awaken is their job! Only the opportunity 
can be provided and sometimes it works and other times, well forget it. 
It's up to the sleepers (masses) to awaken. As we know, there have not been 
too many Masters or fully Enlightened Beings we know of. Two or three 
thousand years is not a very long time for this awakening process to take 
place and many of us have been around for many, many thousands of years if 
not for millions...

So here we are! Billions of people live in horrible conditions and seem to 
get used to it. Naturally they do get used to it, for they do not know any 
better. That's why suffering is relative like all things in human life are. 
What are we to do about these hungry and poor masses? Are we to help them 
for example by teaching them birth control and other forms of 
self-responsibility? Are we our brother's keeper? Good question! And how 
can we do something about this keeper-ship without jailing him?
Well, here we are, pondering about ourselves and about others. As I see it 
now, it's a very difficult job, if not impossible, to teach others 
self-responsibility. Life itself, for all of us, is working hard and we 
are all loaded with burdens and or struggles to keep going. We are all 
fully occupied with our own awakening process. How could we possible find 
time and energy to help others? In a sense, all people the world over are 
all in the same boat and yet we all sail different oceans... 

What you and I can do for others is a debatable question. In order to do 
anything for others, one would have to go out there and do something to 
help them wherever they are. This as we know is not done very often, for 
all of us in our daily lives are busy learning our own lessons. We find 
these lessons difficult enough sometimes and no time or thought is spend on 
what the billions of other human creatures go through and have to put up 
with. Very few of us have it so together that we are smart and wise enough 
to go out there and teach the needy in other countries or even in our own 
country for that matter. Somehow it seems that "Life is the only Teacher" 
and that our help to awaken others is not needed. Life itself does it for 

So how can we help others? I suggest that there is next to nothing we can 
do! We all have not learned our own lessons yet. Very few of us know and 
understand that we create our own realities and only when we do understand 
this, we also understand that all people all over the world also create 
their own realities. So why interfere so to speak? IOW: we all live where 
we should live and that's exactly where we are to learn our lessons. This 
world is a school in which we become self-aware and eventually God-Aware. 
This process is just as difficult for a student in the lower levels of 
being as that it is in the so called higher states of awareness. We all 
have our hands full! So there, here we are busy working on our own 
awakening and not much effort or energy is left over to spend on helping 
others. Question now is, is this the way it should? And my answer is - 
Yes! However, if you find a way to help others - do it! But only if they 
agree! And tell others what you think might help...

Often Life is pondering the impossible - Gerardus


Date: Tue, 03 Aug 1999 18:48:20 -0600
Reply-to: TriLite@onelist.com
Subject: Re: [TriLite] Meditation

From: Gerardus 
Shakti here: 
I don't want to offend anybody but who are we to be "bringing the light"? 
Why are we so sure that when we "focus" on something and "send" the light 
we are not sending all of our internal garbage along with it? 
Why are people so sure they are pure enough to "send" stuff? And who asked 
them? Isn't that forcing whatever that is even the "light" onto the world? 
Mahrouk sent me this address once where the author beautifully explains 
the dangers of "sending" "forcing" energy: 
Wouldn't it make a lot more sense if we individually meditated and opened 
ourselves to Light for it to enter and work its way - and I don't mean 
"bring down the light"!!! No! That does not work either! But surrending to 
the Light, INDIVIDUAL surrender without taking upon yourself 
the task of "giving light" which, frankly, is quite conceited. This is the 
mistake we constantly make - we try to control the Divine and think it 
needs "our direction".... The only true thing we can do is give ourselves 
to it so it can take its OWN course within us - and the 
more of us open to it and let it in, the more the world will change, the 
more LIGHT there will be. 
Of course, until we understand this, we are free to make the same mistake 
and feel that our intellect is in control. Until each of us lets the Light 
into ourselves, we'll keep making the mistake of "preaching" and "sending" 
over and over again.

Hi Shakti - Gerardus here: 
You are not offending anybody or anysoul! And if anybody or anysoul is 
offended - well that is their choice. Further to what you write - you have 
a point and you must do, what you feel to be the best for you and the world 
or universe...

About this address. 
I clicked on it and among other things this person says: 
""How we approach offering healing, love and light is very important. Done 
without permission to another it is wrong.""

Gerardus here: 
What happened to the: There is no right or wrong? As I see it - It all 
depends on the individual and its emotional attachments and orientations...
Therefore, I do not agree with what this person says! You can send Love to 
your spouse or child and/or baby, or sick mother without asking permission. 
Did you ever receive a letter and on the end it says: Thinking about you 
and sending you Love. DID THEY have your permission? Did you smile or did 
you make efforts to reject it and tell them so? Like I don't want your 
Love. I do not think so...

I agree that there might be cases were a Healer or Sender ought to be 
careful what s/he does. They are Karmic Ties! I figure that sending Love 
or Energy to anysoul with the intention to leave it up to them to do with 
it what is best for them is fine with me. In my book energy is neutral. It 
is up to the receiver to do with it as it sees fit...

My overall view is this: 
There is but One Divine or Creator or TIL. We Are It! 

*** I AM THAT I AM ***

Now, who and who needs Light/Love and Healing Thoughts? The world and 
Everybody does! By sending it to each other we are drawing Love/Energy from 
The Infinite Light and are sending it to each other. Beautiful! I do not 
think that it is even possible that one could shield him/herself from 
receiving Love, Light or Healing Energy. The bad stuff, yes, I feel that 
anysoul could shield itself from receiving that. The energy that arrives 
is neutral in the first place. The Light is neutral! Love? Certainly if 
you are so inclined. Hate is you are inclined that way. We live in a 
dualistic world...


I am in the Light and of the Light 
I am the Christ Light of Creation. 
I send my Love and Light to the World of Man 
and I am open to receive the same in return.
I shield my being from receiving all energies 
that are not in accordance with the Love I Am. 


Part of the above is from Yada and part are my words. 
You can make up your own if you like - anybody can! 
Light and Love to you Shakti!
It is the Thought that counts - Gerardus


Date: Wed, 04 Aug 1999 15:40:05 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
Reply-to: TriLite@onelist.com
Subject: [TriLite] Scratching my Noggin...

Gerardus here: 
I'm truly enjoying the different posts today. And I find that I agree 
not just with two people, but with all of them! Must be all around 
agreement day. This brings me to my point here. I do not think that 
there really is a WITHIN and a WITHOUT - or a Me and a You. They all 
are the same thing! I think I am piercing the illusion a bit. For 
whatever we do to ourselves, we do to others, and whatever we do to 
others, we do to ourselves. Our world IS what We Are - what We Are Aware Of! 

What we are is Mind or Consciousness. Within which our world directly 
reflects the quality of the Consciousness We Are. The most amazing 
thing is that there is but one Consciousness or one Mind. So it must 
be our own Awareness (that what we are aware of in this one Mind) that 
directly reflects what's going on for each of us - anywhere... 

To me this means that it makes no difference what we do for ourselves 
or for others, for the outcome is the same! I figure that things are 
completely on automatic in our universe. It is the one Mind or 
Consciousness dreaming it and all each aspect needs to do is - become 
aware that all of us are ourselves for the good of all. All right, so 
what about Free Will? Well, maybe Free Will is about what we want to 
become AWARE of. Is this what is meant by: being the Observer? Aha! 
- what do you think/feel or intuit? 

All this reminds me of: 
Ultimately - Nothing matters. In the present - Everything matters. 
The present is the Awareness of the I AM we are. 
! Hmmm ? 

Scratching my Noggin... and... 
Meditating Many Metaphysical Mystical Melodies Mostly Myway. 
Gerardus - still scratching... 


Date: Mon, 23 Aug 1999 07:38:18 -0600
To: gerardus@telusplanet.net
Subject: "Questions and Answers about Human Life"

**** Questions and Answers about Life **** 

Q: Why were you born? 
A: You are a Spiritual Being and you were born or merged 
with a human body in order to experience the Human Condition. 
You are not your body - you are a Spiritual Being.

Q: Why were you born in YOUR family? 
A: You were born there in order to experience specific experiences. 
IOW: Your parents, aunts, uncles and siblings are the ones you 
have met in previous experiences and once again you meet them 
disguised in human bodies. They also are Spiritual Beings who 
merge with human bodies in order to experience the Human Condition 
or life in matter. It is called: Carrying the Matter Cross!

Q: What is the purpose of being alive as a human being? 
A: The purpose is to slowly become wiser and wiser and eventually know 
how to avoid being born in human form. IOW: the Spiritual Being you 
are then is finished with this kind of human life on this Earth.

Q: How many times will I be born or merge with a human body and mind? 
A: As many times as is necessary to learn the lessons of Forgiveness 
and Love. Love is Understanding! 

Q: Why is it that I become involved in some of these awful actions in 
human life, like rape and or being molested by other human beings? 
A: Life is a series of lessons and in order to learn these lessons we 
experience all activities from both sides. So possibly you were 
the molester in a previous lifetime!

Q: How can I put a stop to these seemingly endless actions we are 
subjected to? They seem to repeat themselves. 
A: By forgiving the perpetrators or offenders. We must not forget 
that Life is an everlasting affair and no one is better or more than 
another. We are all in the same school of learning and must learn 
from each other. This is done by means of many experiences in the 
human body.

Q: What is the best way to forgive and forget? 
A: We must learn to become emotionally detached and look at all things 
with intelligence instead of with emotional reactions. We must 
therefore forgive ourselves for any trespassings and then forgive 
others. Ninety-nine percent of Human Life is: Accept and Forgive!
Q: Do I need to bring into the open some of the things that happened 
in my life and thereby make others look less in other people's eyes? 
A: We do not need to bring anything into the open, but it might 
help to rid ourselves of the secretive feelings we have about 
ourselves and others. (Guilt) It might help to discuss things with 
people who have experienced similar situations. In the end this will 
give us greater understanding. Understanding is Love and this makes 
it possible to forgive ourselves and others.

Q: Are there innocent victims in life? 
A: No! We always get what we deserve for we are the creators of the 
realities we experience and need in order to learn from them. Our 
thoughts create our realities. Today's reality is created by the 
thoughts of yesterday and/or previous lifetimes. Many of our thoughts 
were created by us before we were born into the present body.

Q: Is there a God who looks after things? 
A: No! There is no such God. This really means that you are your own 
creator and judge. You are in the process of learning that this is so. 
We cannot blame God or others for what we are or experience.

Q: Why have I not been taught this in Sunday School or in the Churches 
I have attended? 
A: All Religions are for people who are followers! They are classified 
as Non-Thinkers. There are universal Laws that need to be adhered to 
and when we are ignorant of these Laws we run into difficulties until 
we learn them. 

Q: How can I learn these Universal Laws? 
A: By studying Metaphysics or becoming involved with similar studies.

Q: How many people in the world know about these universal Laws? 
A: Relatively few and the percentage might be less than 5% of the 
population of the world. This is why the world is far from ideal. 
Naturally the world as a school is perfect for all lessons are 
available and whichever lessons we need are determined before we 
re-incarnate again. This is why we are born where we are born.

Q: Are religious people better than non-religious people? 
A: No one is better than anyone else! We only play different roles on 
the stage of human life in order to get wiser individually. Being 
wiser does not make us any better than others either. We are all 
different but no-one is better. We are "equals" in this universe.

Q: Are we responsible for all our actions or deeds? 
A: We are directly responsible for all our thoughts and deeds. Thoughts 
are the Energies that create our future. Life is a do it yourself job! 
We are the Universe or Creator in human form. 

For more questions and answers see my pages: 
Look for: FAQ - Questions?

The above was later expanded upon and became this article: Click Here... 


Date: Fri, 27 Aug 1999 19:27:09 -0600
Subject: Re: [TriLite] Creator

From: Gerardus 
Kathleen here: 
The creation is not the creator.

Mahrouk here: (I think) 
I guess I would say, It is and it isn't. When we are in Mass 
Consciousness (asleep) we are not aware, have no Free Will and therefore 
are not the creator. However if we ever wake, become Self-aware then the 
creature is the creator.

Ken here: 
Hi Maurouk and Kathleen. I happen to agree with Kathleen. The creation is 
not the creator. If the creation is simply a mirror of the creator, there 
would be no reason, no purpose to anything or anyone. Merely carbon copies 
stamped out on the assembly line. Fanciful things to admire in a bored 

by the foreman in charge. I'm more than that. And so is everyone else. A 
wonderful painting from a bygone master. Which one lives? The painting 
being admired in the gallery, or the master's dust beneath the ground? 
In my view, there are gifts given to everyone, and in this same light, the 
gift is not the giver. Simply a treasure on its own to be shared. 

Gerardus here:  Hi Ken... Hi Kathleen... Hi Mahrouk... Hi All... 
Everything above is true when we look at creation from within a Time and 
Space environment! However, that aspect of creation is the illusionary 
scenery. The Creative Force, or the Creator, or TIL (The Infinite Light) is 
a FEELING that creates in an unconscious manner and originates in a 
timeless and spaceless environment. It is Mind dreaming. It is Mind 
creating. And Time and Space are aspects of the dream.

Why unconsciously? Well, this Mind does not sit down and says to itself, 
alright, let's create a snybone like Gerardus. Or a tiny mouse for the cat 
I created yesterday. Because of what the FEELINGS of the Creative Forces 
*are* - it becomes Gerardus, it becomes the mouse and the cat. It feels 
that way. It dreams that way. It creates that way! We can also not say 
that Gerardus, or lovely Kathleen, let alone Ken, is a projection of the 
Creative Force. This would give us a multiple of things. The Creator and 
its projection(s). The Creator is One! The Creator *is* its Creation in my 
view, but I have no objection to whatever way others look at it. All I say 
is, the more Gerardus becomes aware of his unconscious feelings, the more 
he is able to create and *be* in his own creation. It's all up to the 

So, what I say does not mean, that there is some kind of Central Force that 
is or acts as the Creator. The Creator *is* its Creation - being Itself. 

Living as Itself. This Self is/are unconscious feelings that become 
realized as the created. Sooner or later the created become consciously 
aware of this. They will know that they are the actuality of the 
Unconscious Force they are. In other words, they pop out of their own Self 
and say - look at Me - I AM Gerardus at this moment and I am living in a 
dream in which it looks like that whatever I see is real. So I am real! 

Yes, I am real alright - as the Creator. Not as Gerardus! That bloke is but 
a dream. Some dream, believe you me...

All is One Energy - A Feeling Energy - creating profusely! 
(Any deeper and the bottom will fall out)


Date: Sun, 29 Aug 1999 11:08:59 -0600
To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Re: [TriLite] Re: Creator/Conscious Creation

From: Gerardus 

Kathleen here: 
About what Lazaris says: 
We would suggest: Many who claim metaphysical expertise are 
capable of pronouncing the words, but based on the disclaimers and 
limiters that they place on this concept, based on the exceptions 
they list, it is obvious that they do not really believe that they create 
their own reality. Certainly they act as though they do not want you to 
believe it! 

"You do create it all. There are no exceptions. There is no fine print. 
There are no asterisks. Not only do you create the way you look at 
things, you create the very things you look at!"

Gerardus here: 
The more we are awaken, the more we will be able to create our own reality 

For example: 
The masses do not really create very much except that they create and 
experience the same thing - confusion! Also, they figure that God or some 
other Force creates all things, including themselves. The masses have a 
"hang up" about God. You touch Him and you're dead! (so to speak)

We do not only create our own physical experiences by means of the physical 
instrument we live in, but most of it is created by the Creative Energy or 
Soul we are. The Soul, when it merges with the new body, brings its own 
abilities and goals - if any. So, it is logical that the more the Soul is 
awakened or mentally connected to its Self, the more it is in control of 
what it experiences in the body and elsewhere...

The body in the mean time, by means of its Conscious Mind, Brain and Senses 
acts like a lens or filter through which the Soul We Are is able to see and 
experience what is called physical reality. In actuality the Matter Reality 
is nothing but an exceedingly crafty created illusion that we accept as 
real. It is mind or energy in certain poses. IOW: we are fooled by our own 
Creativeness and Creation. Which is different for every Soul in a body, 
because the Body Sensing System is different for every body, based on its 
genes, constitution and habits.

Life in Matter is a Celebration of the Creator living as the Created. In my 
view, the very body we live in is such an accomplishment in creative 
endeavor that it completely passes my ordinary Gerardus' understanding. 
IOW: I am a lot more than what shows... 
[end quote] 
>Intuitively, I feel that this is the greatest "secret" truth of the 
>But it is also a bit scary when you think about it, isn't it? It could 
>open the door to all kinds of weird questions, like: Is food good or 
>bad for you only because you "agree" or "decide" that it is good or bad?

Gerardus here: 
You have a good point here Kathleen. There are certain physical laws 
however that make certain foods good for the body and others less good if 
not poisonous. We need to learn what is good for us and every body might be 
a bit different. I feel however that a Master could eat anything and it 
would not hurt him/her one bit. Masters make their own laws...

Chocolates and ice cream anyone? - Gerardus 
I liked Sam's response to this Post - Excellent!


Date: Tue, 07 Sep 1999 10:42:53 -0600
From: Gerardus 
Subject: About Karma / Reality

About Karma: 
Naturally if you believe in Karma, you believe in previous lives. I see it 
as follows; the lives we have lived in the past are the 'generators' of the 
lessons for today. This to me means, that whatever we need to encounter 
will be provided for in the present, as well as in the future. That's why 
we must live in the BeHereNow space. This space is not concerned about the 
future. The future will take care of itself, for it is created by the 
appreciation and love we enjoy today. Each life gives us the opportunity 
for additional experience. And wisdom is the result of experience. This 
will eventually bring all of us to the Crown of Achievement - The Christ 

About creating our own reality: 
Then coming to the self created reality bit - well - our lives are the 
result of our actions of the past and the deeds and thoughts we enjoy 
today. The human instrument in that sense is not the creator of any future, 
but the soul-mind living in this temple is bringing everything that is 
needed with itself, when it arrives at birth. In other words, our Karma is 
neatly packed in our genes and aura, as well as in the genes and auras of 
all others we meet. 

They are also working on their realities. Human Life is 
a Mosaic of Auras and Actions expressed as Physical Reality. No doubt we 
all create and meet what we need in order to arrive at the Port of Self in 
a style of infinite Greatness. In the mean time, enjoy your stay at TriLite 
and at my Pages... 


Date: Thu, 09 Sep 1999 09:44:59 -0600
Reply-to: TriLite@onelist.com
Subject: Re: [TriLite] Walk-ins

From: Gerardus 

Evin, write: 
I don't feel a lot of connection with Evin - his perspectives, interests, 
and all that. Some things have stayed, like enjoying writing, but I believe 
that, that is part of the body's inclination. 

Gerardus here: 
My thoughts/feelings here say: 
The Body Mind and the Soul Mind work as One Mind when we live in the body, 
but after many years the Body Mind has become trained by the 
characteristics of the dominant expressions of the Soul Mind(s) that 
entered the body. That's why I agree with what you say here Evin that it 
is your body's inclination now to write. 

IOW: your body has become an able and willing instrument for the Forces 
that lived with it. This is good work! No doubt it is quite confusing to 
figure out who or what we really are as a human being - but for sure we are 
not the body. We are the Light or Soul living in these bodies! This Light 
or Soul has expressed itself into Zillions of other Lights who in their 
paths of learning occupy bodies. Not necessarily do these Lights (we) just 
have to do that in but one body for its lifetime. The more the better I 
would say, for it gives the Light We Are a greater variety of experiences, 
while all these Lights/Souls use but the one Body or Instrument called Evin 
in this case...

Evin is a Taxi - Gerardus 


Date: Mon, 27 Sep 1999 18:48:09 -0600
Reply-to: TriLite@onelist.com
Subject: [TriLite] Trilite: Do Things just happen

Paul here:
Hi Gerardus and everyone, 
The difficulty in comprehending both human free will and divine 
predestination as mutually compatible lies in the fact that these seem to 
be contradictory to each other. The difficulty does not so much lie in 
the paradox of the duality of free will and predestination being 
manifestation of the one reality as in the fact that the duality is seen 
as two separate realities. The truth is that the one reality manifests as 
dual but not as separately dual. Our rational mind is responsible for the 
separateness aspect of duality.

Hi Paul and Every One - Gerardus here: 
Thank you for your response Paul. I see things as follows. The Divine is 
the Unconscious Force that manifests itself as Creation. However the Divine 
is not aware of what it is doing or has done! It does not even know what 
it is - we do - it is us!! So, the created are aware of their beingness as 
such. Meaning that a mouse knows how to be a mouse and an atom knows how to 
be an atom, but the so called Divine is not aware of any thing. Not aware 
of itself as itself... 

In the mean time, we as human Beings are still in the process of becoming 
aware of what we really are. IOW: we are not realized beings - but animals 
are! They are in a different mode of evolution and have completed their 
mode. We, poor Souls, are still struggling to get a hold of What We ARE. 
Doing this is done in seemingly separate episodes of learning - called 

While we are doing all this, we have invented some kind of communication 
with words which in and by themselves are not what we try to point out with 
them. (A name is not the thing and a thing is not its name) This sloppy way 
of communicating confuses just about everybody when it comes to the 
workings of the universe for words are but words. They fail to express what 
really goes on. Especially so, since "actualities" are taking place in Mind 
or Consciousness and not in some realm called the Physical Reality. It only 
exist as a reality that seems to be real when you live there in bodily form... 


Paul here: 
The spiritual will, which to us is predestination, is manifested in the 
human being as free will or a capability to choose between yes and no or 
this and that (duality) scenario in a given situation. Because the 
scenarios were believed to be based on the idea of separation from each 
other the fact of free will seemed to contradict the fact of 
predestination or the one spiritual will.

Gerardus here: 
Yeah, words. They pass me by somehow... 
Spiritual Will I see as the unconscious urges of the Creative Force (The 
Creator) who in its efforts to know itself experiences its urges or 
instincts in and as the Created. By trial and error all the Created 
eventually work towards a conscious state of being. For human beings this 
would be Self-Awareness or the Awareness that we are the Creator in Human 

IOW: Free Will is experienced by us at all times, but at the same time, 
what we experience, are the unconscious Urges of the Creative Force. We 
only think that they are our will or desires! So God's Will seems to be 
our Will for we do the picking. Like putting on your left shoe before your 
right one. Slippers count too!

The more we evolve, the more it becomes apparent to us that our free will 
is the Creator within us urging itself (us) to do certain things. It wants 
to awaken! The more evolved/awake we become, the more we know what we are 
here for, and the more our unconsciousness disappears! Good evening "Paul 
The Christ". In the mean time, we also see that Creation or our 
Manifestation as is - is the only way it possibly could be. IOW: God saw 
that it was Good!! The Creative Urge or what we experience as Free Will 
is a built in thing! Nobody could get rid of it!! It's the 
Creator/Creation at work. It's us living... 


Paul here: 
If we realized that the choices were not separate one from the other and 
whatever we chose is manifestation of the one and same unseparated 
reality our choice would not but be the one act of the spiritual will and 
our free will would not but be the spiritual will itself. Isn't the 
purpose in manifested life to play or live out the spiritual will of the 
one life, eternal, infinite and unchangeable?

Gerardus here: 
Yes, I think I say the same thing you do. However, I know exactly what I 
mean by my words but yours make my grabber clam up. I have trouble putting 
it in concepts of the type I grok... 
Paul here: 
In the meantime, while we still live in our belief of separation we 
cannot but work with our experiences as if they are separated and use 
them as the raw material for the path of loving acceptance leading to the 
unseparated one reality or life.

Gerardus here: 
Yes, that's it. We do the best we can with what we have to work with. 
Eventually we get to know that all is well. This does not mean that things 
get easier though. To awaken an Infinite Giant is bound to be stretch that 
is painful...

Greetings with Love - Gerardus


To: TriLite@onelist.com
From: Gerardus 
Subject: Re: [TriLite] Simple Question

At 11:21 PM 1999/10/26 EDT, you wrote: 
From: KLR1@aol.com 

Hi Ken...
Good question! 

My Answer: To become more and more aware of our own Greatness. 

This is 
done Lifetime by Lifetime and in many a Lifetime we ask: What is the 
purpose of Human Life? It is an endless journey and when we finally 
get an answer to some of the deeper questions to Life, we are well on 
our way. In the mean time, we must make sure that the fun part of our 
Life is not forgotten, for there is no destination to Life.

The journey is the Fun, the Purpose, the Goal and the Meaning of it all. 
So let's BeHereNow and smile at our own Greatness knowing that we are 
hiding behind the faces of the small Rascals we think we are. Another 
clue - never frown upon our own or upon the shortcomings of others, 
for they are part of the package. They are a Must! Life without them 
would be a blaring bore...

And yes - Cousin, part of the fun of Life is to have a Ken on your list 
for he is one of the funniest blokes any God has ever met. 
Shine your Light and Smile, the camera is rolling...

The entire Universe is like an enormous orchestra that plays infinitely 
by means of the individual participation of the players. It seems that 
there is no conductor directing the performance. The conductor however 
is the Inner Source within us, and plays its part, in a most mysterious 
manner by directing each player from within. It does this in a silent 
manner and almost all players think they play themselves. All this is 
so because they are listening to their own music. This confuses them a 
lot! Sooner or later they become aware of the Inner Source and discover 
that they are the Inner as well as the Outer - for All is One!

Light... Love... and Laughter. 
~ Gerardus ~ 


Date: Wed, 15 Dec 1999 19:34:44 -0800
Subject: [SC] There is no Right and Wrong...

From: Gerardus 
At 07:51 PM 1999/12/15 +0100, you wrote: 
From: "Kristina Peeters"  
Salaam aleikum, 
I wanted to reply to Gerardus' question why people seem to be such a limited 
scope of understanding. 

I guess many (with the emphasis on MANY and not on ALL of them !) people who 
call themselves islamic, catholic, jewish or otherwise religious, like to 
believe that they are right and others are wrong. It doesn't work like 

Hi Kristina... 
Right and wrong are but personal opinions. In a universal system based on 
free will, necessary in order to awaken and/or grow in awareness, there is 
no right or wrong. It's but a human distinction. The universe does not see 
right or wrong. All is allowed and necessary in order to grow, to awaken, 
to become wiser. IOW: God forgives everyone and everything! As you might 
know we all reincarnate thousands of times. Our Soul that is - naturally our 
body only lives once. Next time we live in a different body and might be 
born into a different country and into a different religion. Now what?

Since the world has different kind of Souls. Some wiser, some moderate and 
some not fully aware - that is the cause why certain people have such a 
limited understanding. The world is a Cosmic School and many of us are in 
Kindergarten. Many in grade one and a few in grade three or four. There are 
hundreds of grades...

Thank you for your post Kristina! 
Life is an investigation - Gerardus


Date: Fri, 17 Dec 1999 10:53:39 -0800
To: TriLite@onelist.com
Reply-to: TriLite@onelist.com
Subject: Re: [TriLite] Tiny Question...

Paul here: 
Evolution of consciousness consists in upward movement to higher forms of 
consciousness up to the highest or supreme consciousness. The universal 
mind at the very top must be of that consciousness.

Joe here: 
I think I agree with gerardus on this one, i dont think consciousness 
consists in upward movement, we are not at the bottom or the lower levels, 
we already are supreme consciousness, we just dont know it and we must 
rediscover it. So spiritual evolution is a stripping away rather than a 
moving up.

Hi Joe... 
Yes, spiritual evolution is an awakening to what we are. It is a stripping 
away of the veils from our eyes. It is a discovery of our Self and 
Unlimitedness as the Creator. I am the Father are One - Jesus.

We must remember however, that the universe is neither "this" not "that". 
It is what we create it to be. So, if we create a TIL or God on top - well 
there it sits! We as human beings are still the same - TIL or God. We are 
the Creator manifested. It all depends how we look at things. I do not 
think there is but one way. It still comes all down to how we see our 
neighbor and treat him as if s/he were us. This is very hard sometimes - 
for some of them are not quite me yet... 


Joe here: 
However gerardus, you say the creator is not aware or conscious of creating, 
but we as the creator ARE aware and are conscious of our creative powers, 
how do you reconcile these 2 points?

Gerardus here: 
As human beings we are aware of certain aspects of our creative powers. 
Like creating or writing posts and/or poems and/or any creative act as we 
know them in architecture or technology or whatever. We are precisely 
aware of our powers and greatness in these disciplines. We are learning 
more and more each day. Learning is becoming more aware...

However - are we aware that we create our eyes, our nervous system, our 
brains? Regulate our blood pressure? Our digestive systems? Are we aware 
of any of those creative activities?? Hardly! There are billions of acts 
of creativity we are unaware of. You say aha - mother nature does all 
that. Who is She??

I feel that slowly but surely we will eventually become more and more aware 
of HOW Great we really are. This to me has become a Self-Discovery... 


Have a happy and blissfully peaceful christmas! 

The same to you Joe - Gerardus


Date: Sun, 19 Dec 1999 19:22:10 -0800
Reply-to: studycircle@onelist.com
Subject: [SC] An emotional attachment?

From: Gerardus 

To all StudyCircle Students...
If you are religious - ask yourself the following question:

Why do I believe what I believe? 

I do not require an answer or response on the list, nor privately! Just 
answer to yourself! I already know why you are following a certain 
religion and think that in some way it will bring you closer to God. If you 
do get closer - Fine! I have no quarrel with that. Your life is your 
business - not mine. Yet, I am asking you the above question. For really - 
it is your question - not mine...

Here is my answer: 
People are religious because human beings are religious beings - it is in 
their genes! They have this inner feeling that cannot be expressed in words 
directly and they feel that the religion they are following is the answer 
for them. But is it? 

What happens if the next time around you are born into a family with a 
different religion? Are you following that religion then? Then you say: I 
do not believe in reincarnation? Well, the universe works very smoothly 
without your beliefs. As a matter of fact, it could not care less about 
your beliefs! Law is Law...

Could it be that you have invested so much energy into the religion you 
follow, that it has become an emotional thing? An emotional craving? An 
emotional attachment? Did you know that you will never become clear in 
your mind unless you drop this attachment? Emotional attachments are the 
conditions that keeps you reincarnation, again and again. Wouldn't you like 
to be free from returning endlessly?

A religion is an emotional attachment to words 
that keeps you prisoner within the walls of your own thoughts.

No Belief - No Religion - No Attachment to Faith... 
That's me - The One Candle Guy - Gerardus